The Official Richard Souther Blog

Waxing Nostalgic In The Christmas Season

2011-12-01T19:05:00.000-08:00

Oddly enough, many of my early childhood Christmases were spent in Las Vegas at a hotel called "The Hacienda."
Both my Mother and Grandmother liked room service. My family was anything but conventional. I was always near a TV ready to get lost in Christmas movies. It's A Wonderful Life, The Bishops Wife and of course, A Christmas Carol (Scrooge 1951). Films that took me to a special place and created some wonderful and nostalgic memories. I still watch those films and they're always new.

Mom and Grandma are gone now and I do miss them at this season. My wife's family has more than made me feel loved and a part. I will eternally be grateful to them. Cyndi always goes out of her way to make Christmas special for everyone around her...especially me!

Cherish the moments you have with those you love. ~Richard

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SpbthuKFuFA

The Summit Of Our Years Together

2011-10-12T07:44:00.000-07:00

I honestly don't know how people get married today. We live in a ME society and the spin is "it's not my fault!" Look what you did to ME! I want out! You were different when we just lived together! You were nice and cared and you listened to me. We connected...
I can tell you how my wife and I have lasted through the twenty-some years. Three things: God, commitment and our deep love. In that order. When God came in second or third place...life became a series of "dissociated episodes." Marriage ain't like all those romantic movies we grew up with. It's a willingness to die to yourself for the other person. Sometimes on a daily basis. It isn't about YOUR needs anymore. You are a team now. God being the focus point. All eyes and hearts on Him first. In my humble opinion, it is the only way you don't bail out of marriage. It's not always roses but when you find your true companion, it's the best! There is no "perfect person." Soul mates reads well in novels. Why should we stay with each other then? They say "the grass is always greener on the other side" and it probably is for a moment, without God at the top of the summit...

A friend and and I wrote a song about getting married many years ago and it still holds up. And we both still believe it.

Standing In The Son
Man is sometimes called to live alone,but loneliness is hard for one to carry.
Most need someone to help them make a home,for their hearts won't be complete until they marry.
Yet, I've seen so many promises get broken,when the dreams don't always turn out like they're planed. And a love that started out to be a fortressslowly crumbles like a castle made of sand.
So let's build our lives upon the Rockand the wind and rains can come.Then our love will not be shakenwe'll be standing in the Son
Yes, we'll build our lives upon the Rockand the wind and rains can come.
Then our love will not be shakenbecause in His eyes we're one.
Some women dream of havin' one to care for,for caring is a word they understand.
Responding to the one their love was meant for,as both hearts are fashioned by their Master's hand.
So they'll walk this life togetherand follow where He leads them hand in hands.
And as they reach, the summit of their years,they'll look back to the day it all began.
Man is sometimes called to live alone,but loneliness is hard for one to carry.
Most need someone to help them make a home,for their hearts won't be complete until they marry.
So let's build our lives upon the Rockand the wind and rains can come.
Then our love will not be shakenwe'll be standing in the Son
Yes, we'll build our lives upon the Rockand the wind and rains can come.
Then our love will not be shaken
because in His eyes, in His eyes, we're one.
.....Standing in the Son
Words & Music by Richard Souther & Peter York
©1987 Birdwing Music.

In a Split Second

2011-10-04T04:50:00.000-07:00

"You hear it all the time, but your life can change in a split second. Those words don't sink in until your life actually does change in a split second." ~ Lindsey Ingram

What does a picture of a locomotive have to do with a quote by a 2004 Nebraska soccer player? ~ Lindsey Ingram
Well this time it more about the quote than about her story surrounding it.
I could also quote the late Warren Zevon an say, "These wheels keep turning but they're running out of steam.... Maybe that's perhaps that's more apropo! At least the way I feel at the moment.
I had a BIG pop quiz today.
For my friends from other countries who aren't not familiar with this term "pop quiz," it means a quiz in school given without prior warning by the teacher. An examination consisting of a few short questions usually. Hopefully you know the answers and pass the quiz! Or... in my case... a life situation arises and how are you going to handle and react to it?"

Today, for me, not well.
I found myself getting angry and saying things to deliberately hurt someone I love very much. Oh sure, I could legitimately blame the pressures of life that I've been under lately. I could say I haven't been getting enough rest and I'm dog tired all the time. Could say, "I've had no time to think or really pray."
But I won't. There is no excuse in this life for saying mean, cruel things, losing your cool, and devastating an other human being.
NO EXCUSE!
WHY DID THIS HAPPEN?
I don't spend enough time with GOD. ( sorry my atheist and agnostic friends. This blog ain't about you)
Yep, it's that simple.. I MUST find more time, somehow someway and I WILL.
It's not my nature to be mean. I don't like mean people and all of a sudden
I became one.
LORD HAVE MERCY ON ME! Luke 18:9-14

Forgiveness

2011-09-25T19:25:00.000-07:00

“To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you.” ~ C.S. Lewis

A few weeks ago I felt compelled to write two people and ask their forgiveness for anything I had done to offend or hurt them. I don't hate anyone but like so many, I've been hurt by people in my life. The majority of the time I don't believe it was intentional on their part. It still hurt and my association when I thought about them was negative.

Out of the two people I wrote, I didn't think I would get a response from either of them. I did get a response from one and it was gracious and kind. The other person may never respond. I've extended the olive branch a few times over the years but it never came back.

I did my part.

Doctor King said,“Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a constant attitude.”

You only hurt yourself by holding on to bitterness, resentfulness, unforgiveness towards another person. No matter how they treated you, be the person that says "forgive me for whatever I did to hurt you" whether or not it was you or them that experienced the mistreatment.

It's the only way that I've found in life to truly be free of the negative associations one can collect on the road of this LIFE we all travel. It does not matter if they can't forgive you. You want them to naturally, but that part is up to them.

The important thing is you are no longer carrying that baggage around (it's not necessarily overnight that you'll feel the release but it will come).

In a perfect world it would be great to experience an embrace from that offended person and hear the words, "I forgive you, forgive me" but you may also hear, "I cannot ever forgive what you did to me."

My Savior say:
This, then, is how you should pray: Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. ~Matthew 6:9-15

Unforgiveness is like cancer. It will slowly destroy your life, spiritually, emotionally, mentally and physically.

Again, don't think you're getting off easy by saying to yourself, "I forgive them"... and let that be the end of it. Go to them or call or write to them. Do whatever it takes on your part. For YOUR sake. Your life will be better because of it. I promise! ~Richard 70X7

Experienced Coins

2011-09-11T19:47:00.000-07:00

Once upon a time, when I was a young man traveling on a long journey called life,
I met a very special person who, out of his great kindness, gave me a large bag full of old gold coins he often referred to as, "experienced coins."
He told me, "these are very rare hard to find coins and I want you to have them. I said, "But what are you going to do without them?"
He said, "I don't need them anymore because they are now a part of me. Just by having these coins in my pocket, I've become very rich. Not just monetarily rich but wealthy in the life I've been given.
Don't ever hoard these coins but give them to as many young people that you think could benefit by having some.
These are far beyond magic coins." I could see he had a very big bag of these "experienced coins."

He then pulled out of his back pocket an old frayed map. He pointed to a small town on the map and said, "go to this little town and you'll meet some young people who'll hear your story about the coins and possibly believe you. They may believe you enough to see the value in these old coins. Might even believe your story about the man who gave them to you.
And then, I want you to give the coins away to those young people. The ones who "truly desire the experienced coins.

I asked, "why would they ever believe such a seemingly far fetched story by someone who is practically a stranger to them? I don't have the "youth attraction, charisma or media credibility" that young people look for these days."
The man replied, "remember way way back, when I gave those coins to you? You didn't use any of them in the beginning did you?
But... you held onto them. They started to come in handy as you grew older. And Richard...it's not your judgment call whether they use them or not. Just give them away like I gave them to you."

And then I knew in my heart it was time to leave so I said say good-bye to the young people and the little town on the old frayed map.

Healing Scars in Showbiz

2011-08-28T19:44:00.000-07:00

As I sit here in bed watching one of the most enjoyable and poignant "screwball comedies" ever made called "My Man Godfrey" I'm reminded of a story about a random act of kindness told to me by my mother, actress Katherine Yorke.
It involved an exchange with her and the wonderful Carole Lombard.

When Mom was a young tom girl she cut her cheek rather deeply on a piece of barb wire while climbing under an old fence.
She was a very beautiful woman and early on learned to cover up the scar with a special wax made for those kind of blemishes. Mom was a movie contract player for MGM, Universal, Warner Bros and RKO. She was also Ingrid Bergman's double in several films. Katherine was always conscious of that scar but nobody could tell if you weren't looking very close. Ms. Lombard was introduced to Mom on a set one day. She was a "what you see is what you get and rather a potty mouth kind of gal." One of the first things she said after their introduction was, "Katherine how did you get that scar on your face?". Mom just broke down and started crying. I mean this was a big movie star saying this to her. Carole, realizing she choose the wrong words at the wrong time immediately apologized. Then said, "Katherine I have one just like it, look!". They became good friends after that rather emotional first encounter.

Mom was one of the last people to see her before her tragic accident. Mom was working on an film staring Ms.Lombard's husband Clark Gable and Lana Turner. Carole unexpectedly came in on the set that day as she was leaving to sell U.S. War bonds. She saw Ms.Turner sitting on Clark's lap in a romantic kind of way. They were on break. Carole looked around and saw Mom. She came over and said, "hello Katherine how you been?." They chatted for only a brief moment. Mom could see she was upset. After that Ms. Lombard turned around and walked out of the set not even saying hello to Clark. That was the last time Mom ever saw her. She told me Mr. Gable was a great guy (on and off the screen) and always had gals going after him. But Carole was the love of his life.

Disclaimer: This was relayed to me personally by my Mom. This was her story about Carole Lombard.

The recipient of random acts of kindness

2011-08-22T21:48:00.000-07:00

I am a person who throughout his entire life has been the recipient of random acts of kindness. I count my blessings often, but never enough. People have gone out of their way in my life to bless me in some fashion. I could boldly say, "well I'm a good person, I've never deliberately tried to hurt anyone on purpose, I deserve good things happening to me!"

Nope; I've always known that God is watching out for me. Giving me favor with people.
I count myself very fortunate to be on this planet at this time knowing all the good people I know.

I've talked to God throughout my life even since I was a little boy. I can't say I got audible responses from Him but I knew His presence was there when I spoke to Him.

I knew (and know) that He loved me. I wanted to "do right" for Him. My mom and grandma loved the Lord in their own way. My father (who was absent most of my life) was an agnostic and felt I was a great disappointment as his son. But... he did love me in his own way and was there for me when I needed help. I'm very proud to be called the son of Howard Trowbridge Souther.
I also had a step-father who passed away when I was five. Floyd Boes was his name and I learned what unconditional love was because of him... even in that short time we had together.

I have been the recipient of random (and no so random) acts of kindness. I have also attempted to be the giver of them when moved to. But... I would be a conceited fool if I were to give you the impression that I am another "good guy." It's my relationship with Jesus Christ that would make me jump in front of a bus for a stranger or an animal if I thought I could save them from harm. I'm nobody's hero. Anybody can copy and paste noble thoughts and inspiring quotes on Facebook.

Know that for me personally; "good ain't good enough!"...

I'm at a place in my life (FINALLY!) where I don't need someone's approval BEFORE I need God's approval. Yes, everyone wants and needs validation. I want my friends to say, "awesome job, that music moved me, etcetera, etcetera." But not at the expense of self compromise.
I want to know God is pleased with me and that whatever blueprint He has left for me to fill; that I'm fulfilling it.

DISCLAIMER: The writer of this blog (me) will probably turn many people off after saying these things. We all have our different views of religion or agnosticism and I have readers coming from all walks of life that hate it when I talk like this. It's way more comfortable to discuss the lighter things like music and the arts.
But I said when I started writing these blogs several years ago, it would be "A PLACE TO SHARE SOME THOUGHTS I HAVE ABOUT LIFE, MUSIC AND GOD..."

I pray my words can make a difference in someones life...and for the better. That's why I post these things! ~Richard

The Hourglass Is Ticking

2011-08-04T22:51:00.000-07:00

The Future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is. ~C.S. Lewis

What happened? I turned sixty and now everyone is younger than me. What the heck happened? I was on a local television show a few days ago and in the monitor I looked like an advertisement for liver spot remover and a candidate for hair club for men. I was backing a young fellow that has his whole life ahead of him and I thought any minute the "geezer police" where going to run up and arrest me.

TIME has made it's guest appearance on my life's personal talk show and I gotta say I am still in shock. I've never thought of myself as being vain. Wait a minute, my old manager (God rest his soul) talked me into getting a "hair weave" during my Narada years. What a pain in the head! But that was a long time ago and I prefer hats these days.

Okay I'm getting older. Sometimes the oldest guy in the room. But that's just the body. I listen to every kind of music I can get my hands on. When the brain and hands are in sync, I can pretty much play what I hear in my head and I do take requests. I gotta exercise, gotta floss, cut out the foods that do you no good (I'm getting there!).

LAST PART: Love people, verbally compliment everyone the good Lord brings you in contact with each day (especially your better half). Take good care of your pets. It's stinks that their little lives are so much shorter than ours. Get rid of all your hate and bitterness towards people living and dead. You are just hurting yourself and shorting your life. DON'T GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS. As long as you have a breath, you gotta try and try and try again. ~Richard

Random Thoughts As I Turn 60

2011-06-18T18:10:00.000-07:00

"Call me a relic, call me what you will. Say I'm old-fashioned, say I'm over the hill"~George Jackson (writer of "Old Time Rock and Roll")

As I face the big "Six Zero", I'm glad to still be alive on planet earth. I know my best days are ahead of me.
My life is no longer about leaving behind some great body of music that gets re-discovered in 20??. It's about the imprint I leave on the the people God has put in my life. It's about wanting their life to have been a little better in some way for having known me (and me for having known them). That is what I really desire at this new season. Over the years I've blown up enough bridges. Never deliberately, but out of my own ignorance. Promising something and not keeping my word is usually the detonator. I know how I've felt when promises were made to me and not kept.

I love inspirational quotes. I guess I'm an idealist. I like how great quotes motivate me to be a better person. I love sharing them with people. This new season I want to share them by "living them."

I've lost a lot of dear friends since we moved to Utah six years ago. It's reminded me again how precious each day and each relationship is.

I hope I get to live into my nineties. I truly am thankful for the life I have lived to date though. God has been very gracious to me. "Life didn't turn out the way I thought it would. It keeps getting better."

Just some random thoughts as I turn sixty.~Richard

The Prayer Closet Vol 2

2011-05-24T21:10:00.000-07:00

The Prayer Closet Vol 2 is part of a new music series I've written specifically for communion and meditation with God. As I approach the age of sixty I realize that there is nothing more important than spending quality time with my Creator. If I'm going to spend eternity with the God of the Universe I should probably get to know Him intimately now. He wants that more than I. The problem I personally face is there are so many distractions and so much "noise" going on throughout my day. It keeps me from taking the time to decompress. I've found that if I don't somehow make room and take the time, my day goes so so. Even my doctor says that I should take thirty minutes a day to do the thing I enjoy the most. The thing I enjoy the most is playing music to the Lord. It's my quiet time with Him. I'll talk and listen (mostly listen) during those thirty minutes and find that most times my perspective has changed for the better. I wanted to share this music with the hope that it will cause the listener to start up a fresh conversation with God. Since The Prayer Closet Volume 1 has been well received, I will continue to record and release this series with the belief that it will add something very special to the lives of all who hear it . All the best~Richard

The Prayer Closet Vol 1 and a quick back-story

2011-04-07T12:15:00.000-07:00

I'll be sixty years old in a few months. I have asked myself many times, "Lord why am I here?". I have also said (especially lately!), "Jesus, thank you for sparing my life!" I know that God gave me this love and passion for creating music (eclectic as it is). Ever since I regained the use of my mind and hands after my accident, I have always wanted whatever I do in music and my life to glorify my Savior. My short-term memory isn't that great so I depend on a computer to address that problem. Basically all my music since 1985 has been improvised and captured on a computer or tape medium.
The Prayer Closet Vol 1 is all improvised and played as a prayer to God. I am not ashamed to say that I am a believer and follower of Jesus Christ and that He is my Lord and Savior. Playing music to Him is one of the ways I speak and hear from Him. I don't expect everyone to understand but I hope this project will do what I desired it to do for the listener. To draw them close to God in their quiet time. Many Many Many THANK YOU's to all who have prayed for me and supported my music through the years. ~Richard
The Prayer Closet Vol 1

Growing Older

2011-03-17T10:20:00.000-07:00

Thursday, March 17, 2011

A funny thing happened to me this morning. As I was doing my morning chores I felt a strange sensation on the right side of my head. It was like someone hit me with a shovel. For a few moments I thought I was going to pass out. Then I sat down at the table and it just became a dull headache. Cyndi gave me a couple of aspirin. What was it? I don't know. The interesting thing was that in the midst of all sorts of worst-case scenarios flashing through my mind, I thought, "but I have so much music to write yet!".

I attribute what happened was due to stress and losing our home and car. BTW: My little problems are nothing compared to what is going on in Japan at the moment. And that is a "blatant plug" for giving to the Red Cross.

I have started a new album series to be released in a couple of weeks. I'll let you know when It comes out.
It's music to help take you to a place in your heart so that you can commune easily with your Creator. Background music to pray, meditate or (what is becoming a popular term) soaking. Basically it's my recorded musical conversations with God. I call it "The Prayer Closet Vol 1" because I plan to release quite a few. All pieces are improvised (much like my prayers can be) and some are rather lengthy. This music is what I'd like to leave behind and be remembered for.
May God bless each and everyone of you who takes the time to read these random thoughts of mine. ~Richard

I Wanted To Change The World By an Unknown Monk, 1100 A.D.

2011-03-02T11:35:00.000-08:00

I Wanted To Change The World By an Unknown Monk, 1100 A.D.

"When I was a young man, I wanted to change the world.

I found it was difficult to change the world, so I tried to change my nation.

When I found I couldn't change the nation, I began to focus on my town. I couldn't change the town and as an older man, I tried to change my family.

Now, as an old man, I realize the only thing I can change is myself, and suddenly I realize that if long ago I had changed myself, I could have made an impact on my family. My family and I could have made an impact on our town. Their impact could have changed the nation and I could indeed have changed the world."

Sharing Life In Virtual Space

2011-02-16T20:28:00.000-08:00

If I can encourage someone out there in virtual space by sharing my life experiences, then I am doing something positive with with my life.

I decided sometime back to share my life on a blog. My life, not my family's.

In moving to Utah, I have collected so many great memories and made so many friends, I know it wasn't a mistake. In the financial reality of life, like millions of people, I'm bankrupt, we've lost our home and car.
Many would say I am a failure because I'm unable to make enough money to support my family.

If I trusted in my own track record, I would have to agree but I decided a long long time ago to become a follower of Jesus. I said to God, "Your Will be done in me as it is in Heaven".

My situation WILL change for the better. I'm not sure when or how but it will and the best part for me is yet to come.

Life (whether you are a believer or not) has it's highs and lows. Really wonderful times and really rough times that seem like they will never end. But they do end. I'll hang in there and if you're going through hard times... you hang in there.

God's Grace to you~Richard

When a train goes through a tunnel...

2011-01-23T19:55:00.000-08:00

When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer. ~Corrie ten Boom

In the last year my wife and I went through bankruptcy and on this February 8th our house will be auctioned off on the courthouse steps of Heber City. Leaving Los Angeles to live in one of the most beautiful areas of the world has not been easy on us.

But let me say that I choose to bloom where I was planted. It has been one of the hardest yet fulfilling times in my life to date. When the rug gets pulled out from under you there is a choice you can make. To either crawl under the covers or ask God, "what are you trying to teach me through all this?".

There is a verse in the Bible that says, "before honor comes humility".

Before I moved here, if someone said to me the word "busking", I would have not known what they meant. Singing in bars and restaurants? Teaching little children piano? Be a music director at a new church?...NEVER!

God said, "oh yeah?".

You know what?. Soon as I started doing them I learned so much and drew closer to God than ever before and I quickly grew to love it. I do not know what is next, BUT I know who holds my future.~Richard

The only thing we take out of this life...

2010-12-24T10:05:00.000-08:00

A dear friend passed away recently and I was reminded of something his brother said to me many years before. He said, "Richard, the only thing we take out of this life is the friendships we make."
You've heard the old expression, "you can't take it with you!", we'll, I believe you take those friendships and precious relationships you've made throughout your life with you when you pass.

As we are about to approach Christmas Eve and 2011, Call, e-Mail, Facebook, Twitter, etc...and tell your friends and loved ones how much they mean to you. It may be hard if the relationships have grown apart through the years but TRUST ME, you will never regret doing this. YOU CAN TAKE THIS WITH YOU!

"Are there no prisons? Are there no workhouses?"

2010-12-14T23:19:00.000-08:00

It's Tuesday night December 14th, 2010. I've spent the last week couple of weeks plugging Nyle Steiner's and my new Christmas 2010 project, "Season Of Joy".
Sometimes it's uncomfortable to promote your own album projects but when you're a record company of two (my precious wife and myself), you just gotta do it. Now, at least the bulk of my Facebook Friends know about it and I have to move on to more important issues.

At this time we have more homeless people in America, than ever. People living on the streets, out of their cars or in abandoned homes, etc. I'm not about to forget our responsibility to homeless animals either.
Many people I know are financially hurting in this economy. With Christmas coming on maybe we can give a little something... our time serving a meal at a local homeless shelter, donating warm clothing we no longer wear. Give what you can to your local Rescue Missions. Seek out legitimate organizations like Friends Of Animals.

In the Bible Jesus gives us the example of the parable of the Good Samaritan. YOU are my brother, my sister, my neighbor. Forget that iPad, the Big Screen TV and even my little CD if it takes you away from sharing your time or donating a little money to charity.

MERRY CHRISTMAS, HAPPY HOLIDAYS and MANY BLESSINGS to YOU... Love, Richard

"When I Paint My Masterpiece"

2010-11-25T13:02:00.000-08:00

"Oh, the hours I’ve spent inside the Coliseum
Dodging lions and wastin’ time
Oh, those mighty kings of the jungle, I could hardly stand to see ’em
Yes, it sure has been a long, hard climb
Train wheels runnin’ through the back of my memory
When I ran on the hilltop following a pack of wild geese
Someday, everything is gonna be smooth like a rhapsody
When I paint my masterpiece"~Bob Dylan/Copyright © 1971 by Big Sky Music; renewed 1999 by Big Sky Music

I fight depression just like anyone else. I think to myself, is this it? Is this is good as it gets? Will I ever paint (with my music) another masterpiece? Lately the motivation to just get up in the morning and get to work has not been so easy. I have to remind myself that it's just a season. Part of it is physical and part mental.
Then out of the blue I hear something that inspires me and I'm back in the game. I pray a lot more these days and I know He hears me. My dreams are far from being over...Thanks for listening~Richard

Each man's life is but a breath.

2010-09-11T10:26:00.000-07:00

"Time is tapping on my forehead, Hanging from my mirror, Rattling the teacups."~Paul Simon

I am often reminded of that line from Paul Simon's beautiful song in conjunction with PSALM 39:5~"Each man's life is but a breath."

I would like to say that after my accident in 1981, I appreciated each day more. I do... most of the time but not all of the time.
We have absolutely no way of knowing if today is our last day on earth or we'll live to be one hundred. There are no guarantees.
So what if this was my last day on earth? What would I do different?
Would I try to finish some last piece of music to "leave behind"? NO!
I would spend it loving my wife, my family and my animals. I would call the people that mean the most to me and tell them how much they have meant to me and how much I love them (I would not expect them to automatically know it.) I WOULD SAY IT. And... I would ask the Lord to "orchestrate" my final hours before I go to be with Him.

Now... I hope to live to a ripe old age but I never want to take the people in my life for granted. I personally believe the blessed relationships and friendships we make in this life are the only things we'll take out of it when we pass on.

Be Still My Soul

2010-09-05T09:10:00.000-07:00

Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake

To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know

His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below.
~Katharina Amalia Dorothea von Schlegel

Lately for us it's been one day at a time. Some days, one hour at a time! We are still in (what would appear to be) limbo regarding what is next in this adventure called life. And winter in Utah is showing signs of making it's entrance.
Today I'm reminded of the old hymn, "Be Still My Soul". I take great solace in it.

Be Still My Soul~Richard

I shall hear in Heaven

2010-08-30T00:46:00.000-07:00

Beethoven and the Apostle Paul shared something in common. They were both partially living in another realm (aka HEAVEN).
Even though Beethoven started going deaf at age 28, he heard those masterpieces in his head. The deafness didn't matter.
Apostle Paul wrote a good portion on the New Testament and at times in unbearable conditions. But, he transcended his circumstances. A part of him was already living in Heaven.
I don't claim to understand it but the closest I come to "that realm" is sitting by myself in front of my music computer composing. Usually it's late at night when it's quiet.
I'll pray,"God use this vessel and pour Your music through me".
The times that I have experienced it were the times I felt closest to God and Heaven.

Tonight (Sunday August 29th, 2010) I sat outside with my electric piano on a stage at a small little pizza cafe, playing for $100.00 plus any tips and a meal (I am grateful for the job by the way). Because of the wind and the chill in the air (it's Midway, Utah), there were very few people sitting outside and at times I was playing only to myself... and to God. I felt that closeness to Heaven. Perhaps that is the beginning of practicing the presence of God.

I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians.

2010-08-26T22:05:00.000-07:00

I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. They are so unlike your Christ - Mahatma Gandhi

I believe it is very hard, even in the world today, to find somebody who does not at least admire Jesus Christ. There is no one who can deny the profound effect His example had on the world.
People say he was a good man, a prophet, a "Rabbi rebel with a cause."
And then you have people like me who are followers of Christ. People who believe He is God the Son and their Lord and Savior.
I recently discovered a dilemma in my walk with Jesus. I realized I am a hearer of the Word much more than a doer of It.
I realized that the things Jesus did, we as Christians are entrusted to do and I most of the time in my life...I haven't done them.

Of course there is a back story to why Gandhi said what he said.
The ridiculous and tragic things that happened in the name of Christ when Gandhi was alive. Then of course the history of the church itself doing horrendous acts in the name of Jesus.
People who actually read what Christ says can see a great disconnect between Christ and many Christians.

But, what about all the stories that never make the evening news every night. Those "real deal" followers of Jesus who are doing the things He commanded and the miracles happen.
It's true...I've seen it in my life, I want it in my life.

I was asked recently by a friend,"Rich, how do you know that Jesus is there?" and my response was, "if you sincerely want to know if Jesus is there, just ask Him!". But be prepared, if you get an answer, to heed to it and ask the Lord into your life..
Before you leave my blog...why don't you try asking? what could it hurt?~Richard

THE BEST IS YET TO COME

2010-08-20T14:58:00.000-07:00

Because of my belief system, I know my best years are yet to come. God didn't take me this far in my life to drop me off and forget about me. In fact I have written proof of that.
In my last blog entry I quoted a line from one of my favorite films, "The Natural". A day or two after writing the entry, I am sitting in a almost empty restaurant and in one corner of it sits Robert Redford (The Natural).
NO, I didn't go up and say anything to him, but sometimes a "surreal moment" happens in my life where I believe God is saying, "Im still here and I am very much aware and in control of what is going on in your life!"
I think I may of had one of those moments...

My prayer for the readers of this blog is to believe you have a reason and a purpose for being on this planet, now at this moment in this time. To believe your role is more than just punching the clock day by day.

In my personal belief system nothing happens by chance. But we do make our own choices because of our free will (including the ability to love and forgive each other as well as ourselves). And... to walk or not to walk through the doors presented to us.

Iris Gaines: You know, I believe we have two lives.

Roy Hobbs: How... what do you mean?

Iris Gaines: The life we learn with and the life we live with after that.

~Quote from "The Natural" by Bernard Malamud

This Great Adventure Called LIFE

2010-08-16T11:14:00.000-07:00

With all the curve balls coming our way as of late, I felt it was time to say good-bye to my personal Facebook page, and to all the wonderful people I've met or reconnected with. Not easy! I got rid of all my MySpace's as well. Time is such a commodity for me personally right now. Not knowing when we'll need to be out of our home. It could be soon. Our bankruptcy is still playing out. We're praying for Christ's guidance and direction at this time.

I know we we're meant to move to Utah from Los Angeles but like my favorite quote that Roy Hobbs says from the film "The Natural", "My life didn't turn out the way I expected."

It doesn't mean God didn't have His way or will. I have learned so much since moving up here. Just not sure what is next in this "great adventure" called LIFE. But to the few who read my blog I'll keep you informed and ask for your prayers.

May God bless and keep you~Richard

www.richardsouther.com

No One Ever Said This Life Was Going To Be Easy!

2010-07-26T22:38:00.000-07:00

"Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised."~Job 1:21 NIV

Lately I have been struggling between being stressed and being at peace, You know that Peace which transcends all understanding.

I made a decision a few years back to live out my life in plain sight. To try to be as transparent as possible in public as in private. My life, NOT my family's. Having been a rather shy and private person throughout this journey, that decision was a big change for me. Perhaps it had something to do with growing older and just not caring anymore about an image. That is... what people think of me more than what God thinks, as I attempt to live out my life as a follower of Jesus Christ,

Giving that explanation as a starting point, I'll tell you what has been going on as of late in my journey.

I moved to Utah a few years ago knowing that I had to leave Los Angeles. Granada Hills to be exact. I could no longer take proper care of the home left to me on White Oak Avenue. My music work had dried up several years before when my record deal fell apart. I could no longer provide for my family.
Bills had piled up and I saw no way out but to sell the house (the home I grew up in). It had tripled in value at the time and selling it then would afford us a chance to pay off our debts and with what was left we could start over.

Utah is not the "music capitol of the world", but at least in my mind, I thought I could make enough money selling my music on line. To provide for my family, to live modestly and in a beautiful place called Heber City. Heber City is a little town between Park City and the Sundance Resort.

WHAT I LEARNED LIVING HERE (not in any particular order)

1) Playing out at restaurants, I remembered I still have a decent singing voice and people still don't tip well or listen to your music much.

2) No matter where you live you'll find great people and prejudiced people.

3) I became music director of a little church with a great pastor and after some time, God said to leave...

4) I got to play at the opening night of the Sundance Film Festival in Salt Lake City several years ago for a lot of "famous people"and it didn't matter one bit. I still had a great time.

5) People seldom keep their word anymore. Nobody is perfect but... "come on!"

6) I sure miss my friends although I've made some great ones here.

7) Facebook has been a blessing for me, living up here...

8) Get rid of all your credit cards and pay cash!

9) Craftsmanship and "pride in your work" are becoming harder and harder to find!

10) Okay! "enough ranting"

And Now The Rest Of The Story...

I'll just say that I am now becoming an expert on Chapter 7 and Bank Of America (the owners of our house). I'll also say that if everything gets taken from me, "may the name of the LORD be praised."

No One Ever Said This Life Was Going To Be Easy....But With Jesus At The Helm Of My Ship, I Will Find Safe Harbor Once Again Soon~Richard

Humility comes before honor...

2010-07-17T10:26:00.000-07:00

Before his downfall a man's heart is proud, but humility comes before honor. Proverbs 18:12 NIV

Many years ago I was asked to produce a record. It was a rather big record (for me anyway). I wanted it to the the best it could possibly be. I got the finest musicians, a great studio and a very well known recording engineer for this project.
In this studio, as with most, there is a "second engineer" whose job it is to help in every possible way. He sets up the equipment, takes notes on the settings of the mixing board, try's to anticipate whatever the main engineer wants before he even asks. Basically he is a "gopher" for this person.
Our "second" was a newbie who was more than willing to please. He still had a lot to learn though.
As the days progressed, I watched the main engineer become more frustrated and even abusive to this kid who was doing his best. I actually wanted to fire the main engineer but because of commitments to the record company and the artist, I didn't.
One morning I showed up to the studio a little earlier than usual and there was the second setting up for the day and I could sense that he was feeling down. I said to him, "hang in there, before honor comes humility". It cheered him up a little because he knew it was part of "paying his dues". And I am sure the main engineer, at some point, had been treated the same way when he was somebody's second starting out (which doesn't make it right!).
Little did I realize that I was prophesying my own fate to come in a few weeks. We finished the project. Thought we had a winner. The president and artist seemed to be thrilled (at least when they were in the studio).
So, I get a call about a week after the project is done and the president tells me he listened to the project and was "appalled" at what he and the artist heard as the final master.

Of course I was in shock because I didn't see that one coming...
It's all ancient history now but my point of even telling this story is that I was humbled beyond my own comprehension. I thought I was giving the record company the "hit album" of the year. Perhaps I was full of pride for even thinking that but (I was!)....
Well, I couldn't get arrested as a producer or anything else for a couple of years after that episode.
In retrospect, I learned so much from the experience and did go on to record a successful album of my own work.
Humility comes before honor...

Turning 59...Random things I've learned up till now.

2010-06-13T18:27:00.000-07:00

Not in any particular order...

1) Always read the fine print.

2) Never take anything for granted including loved ones and friends.

3) Never take a day in your life for granted because you ain't gonna be here forever.

4) If there is a God, you better make sure quick. Jesus knocked on the door to my heart in 1972. And that's my story.

5) Do not rest on your past successes or past failures.

6) You are nobodies punching bag.

7) Be the best at what you do. The best is never settling for mediocrity.

8) Please God first and then yourself. Don't worry about pleasing others.

9) Give more than you receive and don't expect nothing in return. That includes money and smiles.

10) Never hurt anyone on purpose by reacting to their attacks on you. It's their problem.

11) Love and adopt as many animals as you can give your heart to.

12) Tell you spouse you love them at least five times a day.

13) If you are a musician, never stop listening to new things and keep growing till your dead.

14) Trials WILL come and trials WILL go!

These are just the thoughts of a man with two and a half years of community college turning 59 soon. Take what you need and leave the rest....RICHARD

When NO ONE believes in you

2010-06-03T14:18:00.000-07:00

When no one believes in you... God still does.
He began the good work in you and He will get it done. You can't depend on ANYONE in life to be your "constant cheerleader" except God.
Everyone will let you down at one time or another. Not intentionally necessarily but "people are people".
Family is family, friends are friends and guaranteed, sometimes they will at times disappoint you and even express disbelief in you. They WILL let you down.
Even Jesus couldn't do miracles in His home town because of the townspeople's disbelief in Him (the carpenters son).

Of course there are always going to be some people who just don't like you for whatever reason. Sometimes it's jealously, sometimes it's their own insecurities, sometimes you remind them of someone who hurt them at some point in their life and they transfer that hurt onto you.
Sometimes there are gonna be people who just don't like you no matter how nice you are to them and you don't have a clue what their problem with you is. Probably you never will. "I hate that one especially!"

But God sees the big picture. He has the aerial shot of our lives.
And He will never fail or forsake us.

Like I said in my last blog entry: I feel like I'm running out of steam but I hold on to God's Word and His promises. He either is who He says He is or I'm a fool for Him.

A note to all my non believing dear friends: you know I've never tried to hide where I'm at. I am a follower of Jesus. He is my Lord and my Savior. What will become of my life is in His Hands and for that I'm very thankful.
This train has sailed a long time ago...

Living In The Moment

2010-05-24T19:44:00.000-07:00

LIVING IN THE MOMENT

Florence Farr once said to me, "If we could say to ourselves, with sincerity, 'this passing moment is as good as any I shall ever know,' we could die upon the instant and be united with God."~ William Butler Yeats

I have spent so much of my life living in the past. Reflecting back on what "shoulda, coulda, woulda" as opposed to just saying "that was yesterday...move on!".
I've also been a little too excited about the future at times and forgot to enjoy this very moment. The right now even as I type this.

Enjoying the NOW. As the seconds pass by so quickly like the proverbial hour glass with the sand running down like the seconds, I want to publicly thank my Savior Jesus for every breath I'm given... living in this moment.

I've seen a lot of death throughout my life. Some eventually expected and some totally unexpected. I miss those loved ones and hope to be reunited with them farther along. And I'm including my animals too! Sorry if that messes with someone's doctrines.

That's the FUTURE not the NOW. Life is a precious gift and this moment is all we really have.

Enjoy the NOW...

Just a thought at this moment...

A SEASON OF THE SOUL

2010-04-26T11:16:00.000-07:00

I remember having an epiphany in autumn of 1981 as my mom and I were driving home from Solvang California. There is a place on that road where Highway 101 curves around and all of a sudden you can see the beautiful Pacific Ocean. It was getting close to dusk and I had Steve Winwood's "Talking Back To The Night" playing. This was a period when Steve was using sequencers and drum machines. It was also a period where I was lost. I saw no musical future for me. As a matter of fact I couldn't see much of any future due to my bout with Botulism. But when we turned that corner on the 101, something inside me said, "I can do that". So I took some money my father had left me and bought a music sequencer and a drum machine. In 1985 I recorded my first solo album for Sparrow/Meadowlark Records. It's was called "Heirborne". I guess what makes me tell this story at this time is that again I can't see what's up ahead but I know the One who holds my future and I have a tangible knowledge of what He has done for me in the past...

Why I Am Still A Christian

2010-04-22T14:22:00.000-07:00

And if Christ has not risen, it follows that what we preach is a delusion, and that your faith also is a delusion.
-Apostle Paul, 1 Corinthians 15:14 (WNT)

"Christianity, if false, is of no importance, and if true, of infinite importance. The only thing it cannot be is moderately important."
-C. S. Lewis

I must preface the following remarks by saying I can only speak for myself and would never presume (ever again!) to tell anyone else how to live their life...

My dad was agnostic. My mom was second generation LDS. Mom's oldest brother was a self educated philosopher and free thinker. I loved "Uncle Chet." Spending time with him taught me to never to accept anything on face value but to always look deeper. He imparted to me his love of philosophy and books. At fourteen I was reading Aristotle, Socrates, Thoreau and Michel de Montaigne. Subsequently at sixteen I left the church unable to resolve my differences. This happened during the Sixties when my generation was on a self proclaimed quest to find TRUTH. Even though I had departed from the faith of my mom's family, I never felt I had turned my back on God. Actually just the opposite. I wasn't sure who God or Jesus was but I was ready to make the journey and find out. Reading books like The Bagavagita, the writings of Alan Watts, Krishnamurti, The Upanishads and (thanks to the Beatles) practicing Maharishi Mahesh Yogi's Transcendental Mediation took me down an eastern path. I found some real truths in all their words but that divine connection I wanted with God was absent for me.

In 1972, much to the shock of my family and many musician friends, I embraced Biblical Christianity. My life was falling apart and none of the philosophies or religions I had investigated could support the collapse. Up to that point the idea of asking Jesus Christ into my life to be my Lord and Savior made little sense. I felt I understood what god consciousness was. I knew the "everyone has the divine spark inside them" mantra very well. I always felt the divine light was inside me too... but praying a simple little prayer, inviting Jesus into my being, started something I hadn't experienced before. I can't say that I felt any immediate changes in the days afterwards. My dark clouds didn't lift right away. But I knew something was going on in my spirit, something new and my perspective on life was changing. I felt happy. Oddly enough I had never "really read the Bible" till that season. It became my constant companion and in time (and with a little help from some friends) I started attending a local church (a miracle in itself!). But thats another story...

Life happens, challenges happen, the road is long and hard at times, people disappoint, God disappoints, loved ones die, our little pets die and "this train has sailed!"... but Love, Joy and Peace indescribable also happen along the way because God is with us when we invite Him in!

Why am I still a Christian after all these years?
The sincere little prayer I prayed back in 1972 was heard and answered. Jesus came in and has never left. The prayer was words to the effect, "Jesus my life is falling apart, if you are really God, come into my being and I'll make you my Lord and Savior. Use me in any way you can. I'll follow you for the rest of my life."

"NOT Listening To The Still, Small Voice ... How A 15th Century Composer Almost Ruined My Life!”

2010-04-20T08:53:00.000-07:00

la-crimis (medieval latin meaning "the tears")

... My wrong, my wrong, my most grievous wrong.~Robert Duncan

Do not seek the treasure!~Pete (O Brother, Where Art Thou?)

These three lines come to mind when the name Carlo Gesualdo is mentioned around me. Stravinsky referred to him as "This great if disequilibrated composer."

Herein lies the dilemma for a musician who wants to use his or her talents “For the Glory of God” and make a living doing the thing he or she loves.

Through a series of interesting events, you sign a one record deal with a well known classical record company, the album gets released and becomes a “worldwide classical/crossover hit.” Perhaps... even a possible gold record?... not sure :-)
Oh yes, by the way...you're the arranger and "de-composer" with a composer who happens to be an 11th Century German Catholic abbess. A composer whose melodies, upon first hearing, transport you instantly into the "heavenly realms."

Next thing you know, the record company wants a “follow-up” album (aka) "V2."
Then... another “interesting event” occurs. A larger competitor company wants to sign you to do the “follow up V2 album" for them. In fact they want to sign you to a "seven record deal" as part of the incentive. There's just one little catch (aka) “the deal breaker." "We want you to do one of the projects for us using Don Carlo Gesualdo’s Motets."
I'm going to move the story from you to me now. "Richard we would love it if you did a project like Vision but using Gesualdo's Motets as your source. You just substitute his music for hers, and add your "eclectic arrangements"..."You know, for kids!"

Now the more I researched Don Carlo, the more uncomfortable I was feeling about this “deal.” As I listened to his music, I couldn’t help but project the man himself onto it. This man had some "serious issues" in his personal life!

As beautiful as his motets were, there were moments that were spiritually and emotionally disturbing...to me. Something was not quite right?
DISCLAIMER: Again this is my story and someone else might have a completely different take on Gesualdo and his music.
Although he Dedicated his works to God, I personally heard no “redemption” in his music... just a tormented soul.

BUT... there was this very attractive record offer. The current company I was with only wanted another one record deal. My main contacts at the company had moved over to their competitor and they were dangling the “seven record golden carrot” in front of me. "It was job security for sure!" This seemed like a no brainer going with them, plus I would be in a familiar "comfort zone” too! So, I ignored the Don Carlo "stop sign," took the carrot, recorded the follow-up V2 album. BTW: V2 didn’t do anywhere near as well in the big numbers, although it was a good project and I'm proud of it.

Then I decided to tackle Geusaldo’s Motets and get it done. By that time I actually believed I could give his music the "redemptive quality" it was missing. Talk about justifying your actions!
After what seemed like a year and a half working in "Rappaccini's Garden" on a Mobius Strip (I’m mixing metaphors again, sorry!)... "our relationship" fell apart between the company and myself and FAX appears on my machine, as if signed by Gesualdo himself, saying basically, “ YOUR FIRED!”

Now about that the Still, Small Voice . I obviously didn’t listen to it! I went "seeking the treasure."
There is a lot more to this little morality play and maybe someday I'll share it. I don’t blame anyone but myself for what happened (not even the record company...anymore!), and I finally forgave myself not too long ago. God forgave me right away!
The long and short of me sharing this story is, If the Voice says “don’t do it!”...listen, pray, listen some more and then don’t do it!

PostScript The project did get completed (with the help of a dear friend). It's been sitting in the record company vaults since 1998. RIP Gesualdo (1561 - 1613)

Whatever you do....DON”T GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS!

2010-04-14T22:54:00.000-07:00

I grew up in the music business. I’ve been playing music all my life and I’m 57. Music is all I know. I’ve seen people I’ve worked with hit the “big time,” then fall by the wayside, never to be heard from again...well, maybe some on VH-1's "One Hit Wonders." Sometimes because they had success too young and couldn’t handle it. Sometimes they couldn’t handle it once they got there and “self destructed.”

Oh no!!!...REJECTED AGAIN!
I‘ve had so many “form letters” sent to me in my life saying “Thanks but this is not what we’re looking for....good luck to you!”
I have the very first rejection letter I ever received from a record company when I was seventeen. I kept it to remind me that it's only someone's opinion.

Friends... some I’ve literally grew up with, some who are now famous in their different fields of music and music technology, from presidents of record companies, award winning producers, musicians, recording engineers, may still see you (me) as you were “way back when,” not as you are now, many years later.

DON’T ever become bitter or mad at them, as is the natural tendency to, just because they see you one way (the person they grew up with), as opposed to the person you’ve become. It’s like that story in the bible where Jesus could’t do any miracles in His home town because of peoples unbelief. “Isn't this the carpenter's son?” The townsfolk, His family and friends knew Him growing up... “but now He’s saying He’s the Son Of God?”

Keep on knocking, believe in yourself...even when nobody else does! God does! Remember a fella named Thomas Edison? He had thousands of failures before he invented the incandescent light bulb but he never gave up on his dream.

I hate to be the one to break it to you ;-) but nobody is going to believe in you more than yourself.

This life is not a rehearsal!
It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks more than what you think about yourself.

WHATEVER YOUR DREAM IS, MAKE IT HAPPEN! .... Well, okay then!

BTW: a note to all "literary publishing houses": The writer of this rant is a musician not a Steinbeck or a Hemingway or even a Steinway! :-)

SOMETIMES YOU NEED A GOOD LONG LAUGH!

2010-03-25T15:52:00.000-07:00

Laughter is the best medicine~Mark Twain

I have a dear friend who I've known for over twenty years and when he laughs, it's infectious. When we would go to a funny movie or even a not so funny movie, his laugh would get everybody in the audience going.
I've always been a fan of cleaver satire from growing up in the "golden age of television". The age of Steve Allen and Jack Paar. But I love everything from the old SCTV shows, Fernwood Tonight, Marx Brothers movies, a few of The Coen Brothers films like Raising Arizona, O Brother Where Art Thou? and some plain old slapstick comedies like Laurel and Hardy and The Three Stooges (with Curley and Shemp). Pretty much any films or TV shows that aren't mean spirited or or make fun of other peoples disabilities.
When I was recovering from botulism in 81, SCTV was was the best medicine in the world for me.
Lately I have needed to laugh more that ever. It's been a hard period and yes I know everybody goes through them. But I watched this clip from the "Mockumentary" The Last Polka and found myself in uncontrollable tears of laughter. It felt so great. Maybe because of the music, being a musician in the re-invention process right now or just cause I NEEDED that momentary release from the stresses of life. Probably the both!
But I really think God knew I needed to laugh at that moment and met me where right where I was at...
I hope you find your "Last Polka!".

And the winner is!

2010-02-02T13:29:00.000-08:00

So many times in life we need encouragement from others to keep on going. So many times in life we don't get it. Sometimes we go "off the grid" either by choice or by an accident.

I think we all want affirmation from those around us. We all want to know someone cares and appreciates you and your art (that extension of yourself).

In my life I have been a good listener most of the time, a good mirror to others, and I will praise friends or people I admire but I never count on it coming back to me. I used too when I was younger and sometimes I' d get the accolades of family, friends and strangers who liked my music.

But I realized when I was recovering from botulism, almost died, and went off the grid for several years, the only person that was always there, besides my mom, was God.

I learned, like the basketball phrase, "he plays his own game", to play my own game. I had to please me and not depend on the praises of man.

When I started recording again, of course I wanted other people to like what I did, but what mattered to me most is that I liked what I did and it pleased God.
At one point in my life I wondered, if I were to die tomorrow, who would come to my funeral? And the more I thought about it, the more I realized it doesn't matter. I won't be there!
I have many dear friends and as I've grown older, I come to tell them verbally that I love and appreciate who they are and what they mean to me. I don't say it to get it back. I just want them to know it...

"Tesla's Christmas" a chance to give back.

2009-11-25T21:34:00.000-08:00

It's been a tough year. My wife and I are very thankful to still have a roof over our heads and food on the table. Many are not as blessed. You see them on the streets, their homes have been foreclosed on. They barely have enough to get by... and some don't. Then, there are also the "other" family members, dogs, cats, etc. Some are abandoned on a highway, others killed at the end of their stay at the local animal shelter. Why?... because people don't have money to take care of them, let alone themselves.

About a month ago, I decided to use my music to give back. An eclectic project, "Tesla's Christmas", was born. The songs are comprised of Christmas Carols... some familiar and others not. Combining electronica with ancient sounding instruments, "these carols will remind you of something you've never heard before".
My wife and I will give all the profits we receive to a couple of charities that are close to our hearts:
The Rescue Mission of Salt Lake City and No More Homeless Pets in Utah
This is the very least we can do to help... Christmas should last 365 days a year.
Blessings, Richard & Cyndi Souther

Click HERE to buy "Tesla's Christmas"

There but for the Grace of God go I...

2009-11-02T19:01:00.000-08:00

As we move into this winter season coming up to Christmas, there will probably be more people living on the streets that could rival the Great Depression of 1929. People who lost their homes, jobs, no food or money. Good people who are willing to do almost anything to survive. It sounds like a Dickens novel, but it's all too real.

There are a lot of us who are close to that place. There but for the Grace of God go I.

Maybe you don't have a lot of money at this time to give to charities but one act of kindness can go along way. Buying a stranger a meal, filling someone's gas tank, adopting an animal, even giving someone a smile as corny as that may sound.
America in many ways is sheltered from "certain realities" that are in her own back yard. "Man's inhumanity to man" is more than just an old quote by Robert Burns.

Your helping hand is what is needed this season. Don't depend on our government to do something that you can do in a moment. No matter what your beliefs or your faith, do something outside yourself and make a difference in someone else's life. It's just way too easy to walk on by.

"Are there no prisons, are there no Workhouses?"

These Next Couple Of Months Will Tell The Story!

2009-10-19T21:56:00.000-07:00

The future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is.~ C. S. Lewis

Not that life will cease to exist as we know it in the next couple of months for my wife, my animals and myself.
But, it may change.
That CHANGE may be "courtesy" of a certain bank. You see over the last year we discovered that "Corporate America" does not care about the little guy and his little family. They WILL tell you what you want to hear every time they call you (which can be several times a day!).
Fortunately last year we took Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace Course and it gave us a handle on how to deal with the "credit card sharks." We shredded all the credit cards by the way.

I guess the point of this little story is that no matter what happens... our life and times are in God's Hands.
This Train Sailed A Long Time Ago. God is either who He says He is... or not.
Too many experiences in my life say: I know The One who holds my future and that of my family and animals.

When Do You Get Time To Think Anymore?

2009-08-29T10:46:00.000-07:00

"There is one consolation in being sick; and that is the possibility that you may recover to a better state than you were ever in before." ~Henry David Thoreau
I seldom get enough time to really think about this season in my life. I am usually too busy just trying to take care of my family and keep food on the table.
I read somewhere that, "He makes me lie down in green pastures". I have always taken consolation in the 23rd Psalm. Especially the part about He Restoreth My Soul.
It's hard to get anything restored when you are always using it. I for one don't take enough time to think unless I'm flat on my back. I would prefer another way to be perfectly honest! but here I am again Lord, flat on my back, and I'm all ears...

Living In The Moment

2009-08-07T21:00:00.001-07:00

LIVING IN THE MOMENT

That's the FUTURE not the NOW. Life is a precious gift and this moment is all we really have.

Enjoy the NOW...

Just a thought at this moment...

A Guy Named Joe

2009-06-11T21:05:00.001-07:00

I never really knew the man. He was quiet, very handsome, athletic, but very hard to get to open up and talk. At least to me. I was his new son-in-law. Our common ground was that we both loved his daughter and we both loved the Lord. Early on into our marriage my wife and I were in Nashville and received a call that he had been diagnosed with ALS also known as "Lou Gehrig's Disease". I remember seeing a movie about Lou Gerhrig's life (Pride Of The Yankees) with Gary Cooper and that "famous farewell speech" but I didn't even know what the initials, ALS, stood for.
Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis is a progressive neuromuscular disease that weakens and eventually destroys motor neurons (components of the nervous system that connect the brain with the skeletal muscles). You eventually die a slow tragic death. You lose the ability to speak or move and you essentially become "locked in" in your own body. Perhaps you are fortunate enough to blink for "yes and no" towards the end and even go on a respirator to prolong the inevitable. In his case he did in order to see his youngest daughter married. Rest In Peace: Joseph Signor
There is no cure for ALS... yet.
Please donate something to The ALS Association also known as ALSA

Another POP QUIZ for Richard...Oh Boy!

2009-05-21T15:57:00.001-07:00

If you had told me three and a half years ago that I would move from my childhood home in Los Angeles (Granada Hills) to Utah, I would have laughed and said "ya sure!". But here I am writing you from Utah.
Utah? what is the connection?
Well... my wife has relatives are here. My Mom's family was from here. That's two pretty good reasons.
But Richard, you're a musician. What the heck are you going to do in Utah? Sing in the Mormon Tabernacle Choir?
Well no, I'm not LDS.
Why not Nashville, Austin, NYC even Vegas, someplace more...well, more music oriented?
Been there, done that.
So how is it going up there for you? Lot's of snow I bet!
YES...but not right now.
Are you making it?
Well...only by God's Grace.
I hear you play restaurants and are music director at a little church up there just starting.
Yes...not a lot of restaurants because of the economy but I'm enjoying playing piano at the church.
Still doing albums?
Yes, from time to time. Sell maybe fifty, seventy five... as opposed to thousands like I did at one time.
Must be hard?
Sometimes, the money part anyway.
So what do you think this is all about?
You mean the big picture?
Exactly!
I am learning how to REST an put myself completely in HIS HANDS.
Sounds like a pop quiz!
Yeah!, the longest one I've ever had and it's not over.
Made a lot of mistakes?
Sure, it's part of life and learning.
Wouldn't you like this QUIZ to end?
Yes!...but not till I learn everything I need to learn.
To rest?... sounds so easy!
YEP!

A SEASON OF THE SOUL

2009-04-15T09:58:00.000-07:00

Each man's life touches so many other lives

2009-02-18T14:06:00.000-08:00

Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?~Clarence the angel from "It's A Wonderful Life"

I've always loved that line (and the movie) since I saw it on TV as a kid. That was probably one of the first times it aired considering my age.
I think most of us take for granted (living our lives in this time-space continuum) how much we need each other.
I'm not talking about the "self-absorbed, all about me" person. I feel sorry for them.
I'm referring to most people who just are taking it day by day, one day at a time, living out the string.
And then, one day that "awful hole" appears. You unexpectedly lose a loved one, a friend suddenly moves away, your beloved pet dies, even someone you hardly knew just sorta vanishes. Like the guy or gal you'd say hi to at the local Starbucks. You've seen their familiar face so often, you feel like you know them.

Your "personal world" feels a void for a brief moment in time.

But...life goes on...you move on...and sometimes that void turns to a vague memory.

I think part of that process is just our own built in protective mechanism.

I would like to think that I would leave more than a void. A very wise friend said to me, "Rich, the only thing you take out of this life are the relationships you've made along the way". For me, it's not the music I've written, the body work that I will have left behind. Big Deal!

It's about my life touching your life...

THE TRUST

2009-01-31T05:42:00.000-08:00

As I have mentioned in my other blog entrees, I am not a scholar with a PhD. I have no literary credentials from a university or college. I am a simple musician who uses this blog sometimes as a therapeutic device to just express my thoughts and feelings.~Richard Souther

Charles Dickens starts out in his classic novel A Tale of Two Cities, "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times"
I'm titling this entry, "THE TRUST". What I'm referring to is a proverb in the bible. Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

As I also mentioned in another blog entry (referring to my commitment to follow Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior),"That train has sailed". It sailed back in 1972 and there are no regrets and no turning back.

There are periods in time (like now) when I don't understand what is going on. This is where TRUST comes in. Where FAITH is tested in some fiery furnace. Where the TRYING happens. When one cry's out, "okay, enough already, stop!, I get it". And for a moment you think, you moved His Hand. And something inside you hear,"NOT YET".

At that point, a strange but familiar peace comes over you and you say, "Alright, but not too much longer Lord".

The Importance Of Being In Earnest

2009-01-06T13:45:00.000-08:00

Yes, the title is a play on the Oscar Wilde book, "The Importance Of Being Earnest"...

It's 2009, I'll be 58 this year, I stand at another crossroads in my life wondering what God has in store for me, my wife and my animals. Thats my family.
Will we stay in Utah? Will we go to Austin? Will we go to Nashville? Or will we go to Paris? You see, I believe He works in the background of our lives even when we don't feel His Presence.

I realized years ago that time never stands still and that even by not making decisions, decisions will be made by time.

I do know now (at this time in my life) that no matter where the location, I will make and create music. It's the calling I have on my life. Music is the gift God gave me. It reaches into the heart, the soul, before it gets analyzed by the brain.
Personally I don't think God spoke the world into existence. I think He sang it into existence.

In Earnest...I'm thankful for every experience I've had in my life. The Good, The Bad and even... The Ugly. I will always be learning from them even though I choose to live in the present. In the now, the moment.
And even though I stand at the crossroads, I don't fear the future. I know Who holds my future...

It ain't good enough!

2008-12-17T16:39:00.000-08:00

The ghost of Jacob Marley to Ebenezer Scrooge: BUSINESS? Mankind was my business! Their common welfare was my business! And it is at this time of the rolling year that I suffer most! ~A Christmas Carol

I live in an area of Utah where twenty minutes away is a community where many wealthy people come to ski and have their second or even third homes here. Please don't get me wrong. I'm not against wealth, in fact I could use a little myself at the moment.
What I don't understand is "the disconnect" when you drive another thirty minutes down into downtown Salt Lake City (or fill in your own city) and there are so many homeless, destitute people. And probably this year more than ever.
Yes, we have our rescue missions, some churches help and many good and worthy organizations that really do try to help the needy here. But it ain't good enough!

And what about our animals?
Dogs, cats, horses, etc., who get left out in the freezing snow to suffer and die. Go to the pounds for a reality check "before they get put to sleep". There seems to be "a disconnect" regarding our furry friends too. That is, at least if you are an animal lover as I am.
We do have some "valid organizations" that try to help them but, it ain't good enough!

Ebenezer: Why? Are there no prisons? Are there no workhouses?

Portly Gentleman: Many can't go there; and many would rather die.

Ebenezer: If they would rather die, they had better do it, and decrease the surplus population.

Someone once said, "Whatever you did for one of my brothers or sisters, no matter how unimportant [they seemed], you did for me".

There are many wealthy men and women who step up every day and give much to worthy organizations. Organizations (some worldwide) that address these injustices and I thank God for each of them. But...would you be willing to "give at all (and not out your surplus) if asked?" I know personally I would have a hard time with that one. Fortunately that question has not yet arisen in my life. But I'm sure it will.

My PLEA dear friends or to anyone who reads this blog entry is GIVE SOMETHING AT THIS SEASON!

You may be broke... but the most valuable thing you have is your time. Support the homeless shelters and organizations that "really" help our animals.
Do your research and make sure you know where your time and money is going.

I am not an eloquent man, and my blog entries are not profound. I am just another musician in this big world... but I am passionate about this.

That person on the street could be you... That dog running down the street without a collar about to get hit by a car could be yours...

SOMETIMES YOU NEED A GOOD LONG LAUGH!

2008-12-05T23:59:00.000-08:00

Hey buddy! Do you know Margaritaville?

2008-12-02T23:11:00.000-08:00

"There's two ways of lookin' at those holes in your shoes. You can dig the ventilation or you can sing the blues" by Johnny Townsend and Ed Sanford

I haven't sung out in public (solo) since maybe 1970-71? (with the exception of a couple of songs at a local park this last year).

In these crazy economic times, I am constantly re-inventing myself and I got a gig at a nice restaurant in Park City playing Thursdays these next few months. And I am thankful!

You do feel like you've come "full circle". I'm playing some songs I haven't done in eons. I am playing and singing in the bar area at this restaurant and I'm essentially background music/noise for folks who want a nice meal, something to drink and watch ESPN with the sound off.
Now I went in thinking, they want a piano player who can play all that stuff mentioned instrumentally... and take requests!
"Nope!", they want someone who can sing the oldies, do current Dave Matthews tunes, and I'm sure (as time progresses) that "Sweet Home Alabama" and "Proud Mary" will make their appearance.

I took the gig cause we need the money to be perfectly honest and again I am not complaining. We all have a mortgage.
But...I also took it cause I wanted to challenge myself. Just to see if I could pull this vocal/piano thing off again after so many years in absentia.

Oh sure, there will be the "piano player banter" (aka), "Hi, how are ya tonight?, nice to see ya, any requests?, be sure to try the veal and don't forget to tip the waitress!, and... of course, I'll play PIANO MAN for you!".

All that to say, that there's two ways of looking at those holes in your shoes!
I choose to "dig" the ventilation!
Oh...and I am available for parties and Bar Mitzvahs...

Thanksgiving and Cliff Hanging

2008-11-25T23:44:00.000-08:00

My life as long as I can remember has been the equivalent of a "Saturday Matinee Cliff Hanger Serial".
There was always something exciting and always to be continued next week!.

Maybe when you grow up that way (and that's all you know), it becomes your "norm".
In my family we never knew if we were going to make it financially from month to month (we always did somehow).
Mom being a retired actress, after having me, still loved drama.
And I think the "cliff hanger dynamic" added a little extra excitement in her life (as if being a single mother supporting a child and invalid mother wasn't enough!).

I do remember throughout my childhood years, that I was always 'thankful". Thankful that we never went without. That my wonderful grandmother (who was always re-acting out the death scene from Macbeth as long as I can remember) lived to be a ripe old age with us.
That I always had a mother who loved me and was always there for me (even though we had our moments!). One thing I did right towards the end of her life was that I chose to remain "present" and didn't numb out or dissociate when she passed away at our home.

Through my 57 years, I have come to realize that every family is a bit "dysfunctional".

Through the marriage to my wonderful redheaded wife, I inherited a new family, who at times can be characters, but have embraced a one time stranger into their hearts and I realized not too long ago that they love me.
I think I am most thankful and grateful for this revelation during this season when we celebrate Thanksgiving (aka) "the counting of our blessings".
I also realize I have been truly blessed with some dear friends and some new ones I never knew existed until now in cyberspace...

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE. LIFE IS A GIFT!

When NO ONE believes in you

2008-11-22T22:47:00.000-08:00

But God sees the big picture. He has the aerial shot of our lives.
And He will never fail or forsake us.

Like I said in my last blog entry: I feel like I'm running out of steam but I hold on to God's Word and His promises. He either is who He says He is or I'm a fool for Him.

Running out of steam...

2008-11-19T20:40:00.000-08:00

I keep thinking that perhaps a song with some lasting significance will come out of this time in my life. Perhaps one that kindred spirits can resinate with and find comfort knowing that their not alone. But I don't know. I'm human, I tire, I keep going for the sake of my family and my animals and my Lord.
In another blog entry sometime back I quoted the Roy Hobbs line from the film THE NATURAL. "My life didn't turn out the way I expected".
I have another quote from the late Warren Zevon. "These wheels keep turning but they're running out of steam. Keep me in your heart for while".
Whatever lessons I'm meant to learn Lord, may I learn them well. I want to finish the race like Apostle Paul did.
Acts 20:24 NIV
However, I consider my life worth nothing to me, if only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the gospel of God's grace.
Someone asked me,"If God said to you to lay your music down, could you?" If He does (and I have often wondered if He hasn't already) I must. But if that's the case, Lord make it clear! and show me where to go from here...

Who said it was easy?

2008-11-10T19:18:00.000-08:00

Nobody ever said life would be easy. I found that out a long time ago. Some days are much harder than others. Found that out a long time ago too.
There was a time I thought that life (as I knew it) was over. For a couple of years I spent what seemed like endless days curdled up on a couch counting cracks in a wooden ceiling. I came to know that ceiling well. I wished I could have been like Rip van Winkle then. Just to wake up from a long long sleep refreshed and knowing it was all a dream.
But there were things I wouldn't have learned how to deal with had I slept through that time. "Character development" is what I guess you could call it.
I didn't know it then but a new life came out of that period. And a "new compartment" was built on inside of me.
I still have days where I wish I could sleep through them... but I can't. I know something good will come out of whatever "life lesson" I'm meant to learn that day. Even if I don't see it now or a month or even a year from now. There is something I have to experience today. I don't miss counting those cracks in that wooden ceiling...

TRUE FRIENDSHIP

2008-11-04T16:22:00.000-08:00

Last few years I've been to too many funerals. I go to these memorials and see people I haven't seen in ages (I mean the living ones!). We almost always say to each other in a grim but joking manner, "we can't go on meeting like this, let's get together soon on a happier occasion". Seldom does it ever happen. That's alright, that's LIFE... and we all have lives (aka) families, work, commitments, etc.

Truth be told; in this precious short life we're given, you can count your real friends on one or perhaps two hands at the most (forget toes!). You have a couple friends that you seldom see (possibly because of distance) but you've known them forever and you pick up where you left off when you re-connect. Your "RED" registers the same RED to them. Their "tracking" with you.
Sometimes you meet a "new friend" and that relationship starts out great, looks like it's got possibilities for a long term thing and then, for some unknown reason, it dissolves into the "I don't know what happened category?".
If you are so fortunate as I have been in this life to have found a TRUE COMPANION (thank you for that song Marc Cohn) you can count your blessings. Some are still looking and others have gone on.
But again, truth be told the greatest friendship you'll ever experience is the one you seek out with The Invisible God. And in my case, as most of you know who read my blog (all three of you), I'm referring to my Lord and Savior Jesus.
My biological father was an Atheist/inventor/genius who thought I was a fool and great disappointment for my beliefs in this Unseen Higher Power. I know he loved me anyway and I'm very proud of him.
Got an email from my oldest dearest friend today who said he may have just had "another" heart attack.
Not to sound too much like a Hallmark Commercial but, call, email, write a letter (Hallmark card?) No forget that, "just call them now" and tell them you love them before it's too late.

Sorry to be so introspective with these blogs entries lately. No Coen Brothers lines today...

Suicide Is Not Painless!

2008-10-26T23:32:00.000-07:00

that suicide is painless, It brings on many changes, and I can take or leave it if I please.~Johnny Mercer and Mike Altman

Today I was asked to play piano at a funeral of 56 year old man who committed suicide a few days ago. It was heartbreaking to look out from the stage and see the deviation that his choice brought upon his family. It was a sad event even for the pastor.
I didn't know the man but I was told he was a Christian whatever that means anymore as it has been so redefined through recent history.
As the service progressed I could see that he was greatly loved by not only his wife, son and daughter (all adults), but by many many friends and ex-co-workers.
From what I could put together (reading between the lines) as the different friends eulogized him...he had lost all HOPE.
He was retired and may have had all his savings lost in the stock market in last few weeks. I don't know this for a fact but the name of Alan Greenspan along with "economic tsunami" was mentioned several times by the pastor.

Is Suicide Selfish?
I did NOT on walk in this mans shoes. I did not know his "dark night of the soul", but YES I believe it is!
I saw shock, disbelief and a floodgate of tears today including a few of my own at this memorial on so many faces.
Whatever your beliefs, Suicide Is Not The Answer. Seek help, get into therapy, talk to God 24/7 and listen... but DON'T GIVE UP! Life is so short as it is...

For Piano Lovers Only

2008-10-23T21:46:00.000-07:00

You see that little yellow toy piano in the picture of me and my dog Peanuts? I was about three when that was picture was taken. A few months earlier mom had taken me shopping with her to a department store and when we got to the toy department... I saw it! For some strange reason, I ran over to it, locked my arms around one of the legs and wouldn't let go for anything. Mom was perplexed and when she would try to pull me away from it I'd start to cry, and very loudly at that! As a small crowd gathered around us, mom started to get very uncomfortable, she said "alright I'll buy it for you, just STOP CRYING!".

I remember sitting for hours playing that toy piano in front of our new Zenith TV (in glorious black and white!). I had a special knack for mimicking commercial melodies usually in the right key too.

In our North Hollywood apartment building there lived a retired ex-dean of the music department of from the University of Utah. He was still teaching piano but more as a hobby. He came over one day to visit and saw me in front of the TV, playing. I guess he saw some potential in me and asked mom if he could give me a few piano lessons.

Those lessons lasted till he passed away when I was twelve. He was like a father to me. I learned the "three B's" (and I don't mean burglary, bribery or blackmail!). Bach, Beethoven and Brahms. But the greatest gift Professor Thomas Giles gave me was the ability to "go off the written page" and improvise.
I've owned four pianos in my life including that little toy piano. When mom could see that music was becoming my passion (and with professors encouragement) she bought a Boston Chickering grand at an auction. This was around the time I was close to four (I had that piano till I was about eighteen). In North Hollywood we lived close to the Hollywood Bowl. Mom would often take me there to hear (and several times even meet) some famous concert pianists. I shook the hands of Vladimir Horowitz and Arthur Rubinstein and for a little kid, that was a big deal!
I always wanted a Steinway grand piano because I loved "that particular sound" but we could never afford it.
Then at eighteen I found a beautiful old mint Steinway upright at a piano shop and traded the Chickering in. That was hard because it was like saying goodbye to an old friend.
I was getting into jazz improvisation at the time and had read somewhere that Joe Zawinul (another jazz piano hero of mine) put fishing weights on the keyboard action of his piano which made it really hard to play. The idea was to build up the strength in his hands so he could play any piano easily. I decided to do the same thing and it worked very well for me especially when traveling on tours and getting a different piano every night.
Then when I had the funds in my late twenties, I bought a 1942 New York Steinway B rebuilt (6'11"). That was my baby! Unfortunately I had to sell it sometime ago to pay bills so these days I play an electric one. Alas the life of a musician with it's peaks and valleys.

But I count myself so fortunate and blessed because (and maybe only a few piano players will understand this) but I have played (and at times recorded on) some of the greatest pianos in the world. Ones I would literally dream about. I hope that doesn't sound too weird.

I don't really understand why but I would dream about playing a "beat up and extremely bright" Steinway B Grand at United Western Recorders (now known as Ocean Way Studios in Hollywood). The one Larry Knechtel (another hero) recorded "Rockin' Pneumonia And The Boogie Woogie Flu" on for Johnny Rivers. I had this reoccurring dream about it and finally did record on it. I wasn't disappointed.

As I write this entry I realize it really only means something special to me so I won't bore you with all the other wonderful pianos " I've met in my life". I will say though that I still run into them and at times want to grab onto a leg and not let go!
Just the other day I went to someone's home up here in Utah and played a beautiful Steinway B. I looked inside and saw it had been "hand signed" by Henry Z Steinway. Funny thing was I was probably the first person to play it in months? I felt like I found an old friend!

Lets put it to a vote!

2008-10-09T19:36:00.000-07:00

Okay... I'm with you fellas.~Delmar O'Donnell from O Brother, Where Art Thou?

Perhaps my take on the upcoming election is somewhat skewed... but I do plan to vote.
I can't say I am thrilled with either candidate or their running mates. I would like to know how in this big country of approximately 305,373,826 people, our choices are...well, what they are.
Alright... I grew up an idealist and probably way too idealistically thanks to the movies. Keep in mind my mom was an actress so that adds another twist. I mean Mr. Smith Goes to Washington was my reference point. So I guess if I was using films as reference points, maybe it should have been something like Charlie Wilson's War.
Both movies have certain truths about them. They do come from the "closed universe" of an author and screenwriter. But truth be told, Charlie Wilson is probably much closer to the reality of politics.
In turn, our country in 1939 needed a Frank Capra's Mr Smith especially at that time in our history. In 1942, a ban on American films was imposed in German-occupied France, the title theaters chose Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (1939) for their last movie before the ban went into effect. One Paris theater reportedly screened the film nonstop for thirty days prior to the ban.
My point is VOTE!
I've lived through Eisenhower, Kennedy, Johnson, Nixon, Ford, Carter, Reagan, Bush I, Clinton and Bush II. There are no Jefferson Smiths in politics. Only in the movies.

Oh Yes... one more thing that only pertains ONLY to us folks who decided a long time ago to follow Jesus. There is a passage in the Bible called 2 Chronicles 7:14.

If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.

Where have ya been?

The Loneliness of the Long Distance Musician

2008-10-01T19:30:00.001-07:00

The Loneliness of the Long Distance Musician

The title of this post is inspired by the 1962 film, "The Loneliness Of The Long Distance Runner". The film, as I understand it, deals with a boy who in essence refuses to buckle under to a wrong authority and settles into the loneliness of the title. I never saw the film but after reading the synopsis, it sounds almost like a Dickens novel.

I've been trying to come to terms with loneliness in my own life especially since moving to Utah. Blogging has become a cheap form of therapy in some ways. Even living in LA I experienced periods of great loneliness and isolation. I think most artists do to some extent.
I wrote in a pervious post about "musicians shorthand". A language few understand and how I miss it because I was around musicians more than most throughout my life.
This post really is about universal loneliness and I think it's something everyone experiences in seasons.
It really is true about being in a crowd feeling all alone. You can be married to the greatest person/best friend in the world and yet feel alone at different periods. You can have long conversations with God... but you are doing this by faith and most times that feeling of being in the presence is a "faith thing" and I believe personally a real thing, but still...
For years I've channeled my loneliness into my music. I'll write a song or as of moving up here to Utah, many times when I'm playing piano out at restaurants, I'll just close my eyes and get lost in some song and that isolated feeling goes away for a few wonderful moments. Even an old Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers works at times... but now my age is showing :-)

World Citizen

2008-09-19T13:50:00.000-07:00

I want to feel

Until my heart can take no more

And there’s nothing in this world I wouldn’t give~World Citizen (I Won't Be Dissapointed) Ryuichi Sakamoto & David Sylvian

My uncle Chet said to me once, "Richard when you close your eyes at night, the world stops". Chet it doesn't. Life goes on, decisions get made (even when we choose not to make them) and we live in a hourglass, like it or not.

What can I do as a citizen of this world to make it a better place with the time I have left?
Well, as a Christian, I can love my neighbor, turn the other cheek. don't judge and FORGIVE constantly.
As a world citizen, I can help through charities like the Red Cross, ASPCA and so many other worthy ones that span the globe, and give to them when I can.
I can't change anyone but me...and that is just with the help of the Almighty. Will any of this matter when I'm gone? Yes because history is evidence of that.

Musician's Shorthand: A language few understand.

2008-09-08T22:24:00.000-07:00

The crypticness of my status updates on Facebook is just my "message in a bottle", nothing more.~Richard Souther

Even saying,"message in a bottle"? It refers to The Police song, Message In A Bottle, but to someone who hasn't heard the song, it sounds cryptic, or the reader could project something on to it that may or may not be there.
To a musician it could be shorthand for many things. But the musician will probably know that the quote is related to that song. "I'll send an SOS to the world. I hope that someone gets my message in a bottle".

Musician shorthand is very odd, funny and cryptic at times. It covers everything from communicating typical musical forms quickly; "take it from the coda and vamp out on the end". Or you could be saying (example) a funny quote by W. C. Fields from his film "The Bank Dick" at a recording session and every musician will know the line. Could be just an ice breaker or a way to call attention to a part that needs to be worked out in the song.

I remember Todd Rundgren wrote an album many years ago called "The Tortured Artist Effect", I was intrigued by the title because the "Tortured Artist", (musician in this case) is a stereotype, who is in constantly fighting depression due to frustrations with their art and other people. The tortured artist feels alienated and misunderstood due to what they perceive as not being understood by others and the things (their music, for my example) they feel are important. Sounds narcissistic but in reality, for most of us oddballs, it's wanting deeply and even desperately to be understood and acknowledged. Our music is something we speak better than words to communicate. But the shorthand helps us build a language to work with each other. Yes, one could say it's rather dysfunctional.
My "RED" to register the same color as your "Red".

Well...in reality it's part truth and part myth. Musician's Shorthand is always an evolving language to communicate abstract musical thoughts with. It has changed since I was deeply engrossed in that world.

I do miss it... I mean the communication with other musicians who were on the same page, in the same room.

“Music was my refuge. I could crawl into the space between the notes and curl my back to loneliness.”~Maya Angelou

THIS IS JUST A TEST

2008-08-28T21:29:00.000-07:00

If This Had Been an Actual Emergency…

Back in 1962 there was a situation facing our country called the Cuban Missile Crisis. I was eleven at the time and remember the fear I personally felt of a nuclear war. The fear of a nuclear bomb exploding in my little town. I even had nightmares about it thanks to the evening news!
I remember riding down Ventura Boulevard with my mom looking at revamped car lots. Instead of the new Chevrolet Impalas, you would see rows of "bomb shelters" or as the were called, "Fallout Shelters" for sale.

But thanks to the leadership of a President named John F. Kennedy, we stood up to the USSR and would not let them bring their missiles into Cuba. Our country was once again taken out of harms way.
We, as a nation, "passed the test".

I can only speak for myself on the following matter.
Call it what you will... I call it a test, other people might say it's just another one of life's pop quizzes, or "stuff happens", karma, etc...

Bottom line is that at times we get challenged in areas of our lives and we're right back on Ventura Boulevard pricing Fallout Shelters. We all know in retrospect that those shelters couldn't really protect you from radiation exposure but a lot of us bought them to make us feel safe (by the way, mom didn't).
Lately "the test" I've been dealt is an old one that I am re-visiting for the umpteeth time. But I plan on passing it this time, perhaps because I understand it finally and fear it no longer.

'Do not fear, for I am with you~Isaiah 41:10

reminisce

2008-08-18T09:43:00.000-07:00

Growing up, we all have some kind of special memories that we revisit on occasion. Just like an old familiar friend you haven't seen in awhile. Memories, “little treasures", those special moments that no one can ever take away from you. Something almost magical, that strings back to our earliest childhood recollections and follows us up to the ever-present. And in those few milliseconds we feel a longing. I guess you'd call it nostalgia.

Those memories are like “landmarks" in your life. They can be anything that triggers the five or six senses. A smell, a sunset, a laugh, a remark someone made.

For me personally, it’s a song. You know that song I'm talking about....the one when you hear it... you immediately recall that moment where you were the first time you ever heard it...and fell in love with it....

reminisce~ gave me the opportunity to sit at the piano and revisit some “old friends” and catch up with them...

About The Songs

1. A RIVER RUNS THROUGH IT

Back in January of this year, through circumstances I had very little to do with, I was asked to be the guest performer at the 2008 Sundance Film Festival, Opening Night Gala in Salt Lake City. In reality that meant I played piano at a “dessert reception” between the screenings of a film being premiered. In thinking of material that would be fitting for such an event, this song kept coming to mind.

The common denominator was, actor, director and environmental activist, Robert Redford (one of the founders of the Sundance Film Festival and director of the film; “A River Runs Through It”). I honestly don't think he was there that night but recording this beautiful theme song by composer Mark Isham was my way of saying "thanks!" for letting me play a part in that special evening.

2. CAPTAIN FOR DARK MORNINGS

Laura Nyro’s 1969 landmark album, New York Tendaberry had a profound effect on my music and still does to this day. The process of adding additional instrumentation to a recorded “live performance” in the studio, of her singing and playing piano, was very creative to me and I chose the same process when I recorded Vision: The Music Of Hildegard von Bingen.

I was very fortunate to see her perform live several times before her passing. I recall one amazing performance she did and never spoke a word...well, maybe "thank you"! It was an intimate setting at a little club in West Hollywood called "The Troubadour".

What made the evening so special, besides the performance, was when my friend and I left the club, we discovered my VW Van had been towed away. We sat waiting on the curb, directly across the street from The Troubadour, till about 4AM in the morning, when my Uncle Chet came and picked us up.

The real show started while we were waiting for our ride.

If you look at the picture of the building, you’ll notice several windows above it. Now all I know is (I don't mean to be tellin' tales out of school!) we watched a “silhouetted figure” go from one room to another, back and forth, past those open upstairs windows. It appeared to be a female with long dark hair. She was playing excerpts from Laura Nyro songs on a record player. She’d play a little passage, stop the record, then sing the parts accapella. This went on for a couple hours. That was pretty cool, even if it wasn’t Laura...but it sure sounded like her! She was after-all, a "stone cold" perfectionist.

3. CHARADE

Katherine, my Mom, just loved this beautiful song written by Henry Mancini and Johnny Mercer. Her favorite version was recorded by 60’s pop singer, Jack Jones, and she kept wanting me to sing it like him. I was probably twelve at the time and she secretly recorded me singing along to the record. A school friend came over to the house and she played the recording for him (much to my embarrassment!). That was my Mom... and how I miss her!

4. CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN
(aka) Climb Ev'ry Mountain

I don’t really know what possessed me to record this song although I love Rogers and Hammerstein’s music. I never was a big fan (probably one of the few!) of “Sound Of Music.” But...this is a beautiful song nevertheless and it has some link into my life.

5. COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS

The actual title is Count Your Blessings Instead Of Sheep

I have always loved this Irving Berlin song and especially Bing Crosby’s version. I admit I never quite understood the bridge lyrics, ”I think about a nursery and I picture curly heads. And one by one I count them as they slumber in their beds.” But the last lines say it all it for me. “If you're worried and you can't sleep Just count your blessings instead of sheep And you'll fall asleep Counting your blessings.”

6. ECHOES IN THE DISTANCE

This song is my favorite song written for the second Meadowlark piano album I recorded, "Second Story".

I have always loved it a little more out of all my Douglas Trowbridge songs. Most people who are familiar with my piano music have probably never heard it. The album was only out for a short time before the label was sold off. When I started performing live again this old friend returned.
By the way, a note to another “old friend” Peter... Thank You! for believing in me all those many years ago!

7. FIRE AND RAIN

I became aware of James Taylor when he released his first album on the short lived Beatles, Apple Records and became an instant fan.... and still am!

I've never met James so don't know the real truth about this song but I've heard different stories about Fire And Rain. I know the words are heart felt, wherever the truth lies, and the melody "lives with you".

8. GEORGIA ON MY MIND

This is a wonderful song written by Hoagy Carmichael and Stuart Gorrell back in 1930. One usually associates it with the 1960 Ray Charles hit but I fell in love with this song the first time I heard Richard Manuel from “The Band” sing it. Levon Helm said,"Richard Manuel was a whole show unto himself. He was hot. He was about the best singer I'd ever heard; most people said he reminded them of Ray Charles. He'd do those ballads, and the ladies would swoon. To me that became the highlight of our show."

Richard's version made me want to record it for this album. RIP Richard...

9. I’LL BE SEEING YOU

I grew up with this song written by Sammy Fain and Irving Kahal. Long before the outrageous costumes and Las Vegas antics; pianist, Wladziu Valentino Liberace had a television show in the early 1950’s. The big thing at my house (I think Monday nights) was having my grandmother, my mom and myself, gather around the, then new, black and white TV and watch his show. I remember he wore a black tuxedo, had a candelabra on top of his grand piano and at some point in the show he’d always say, “I wish my brother George was here!” George would appear out of the corner of the TV screen playing the violin!

And of course... Lee singing “I’ll Be Seeing You” at the close of each show. Judy Collins does a wonderful rendition, arranged by Jonathan Tunick, that also influenced my re-recording of this song...but I’ll get to her later! :-)

10. NEVER NEVER LAND

Jule Styne wrote the music. Betty Comden and Adolph Green wrote the words to this song from the musical “Peter Pan.” I was introduced to it in 1955 when Mary Martin performed the entire musical on that "new" TV we would gather around. She was amazing and the musical was forever etched into my memory. Years later I saw an interview with Jule Styne and he played a little excerpt from that song like it was no big thing! And I thought,"if I could write just one song as memorable as that...”

11. PLYMOUTH WALTZ

James Newton Howard wrote this song as part of the score to the 1987 film, Promised Land. James is a gifted composer who can raise the level of even a mediocre film to something much better than it really is. It's always a treat to hear what creative things he comes up with for a film score. By the way, I’m not saying this film was mediocre. I actually don't really remember it well, but I’ve always remembered this beautiful song. And I only recorded a portion of it!

12. SINCE YOU ASKED

I honestly never knew that Judy Collins wrote this beautiful song until I researched it for this album.

I was on the road with a band called The 2nd Chapter Of Acts back in 1975 and we were basically stuck in Waco Texas for a couple of days. When I say “stuck” it was really because I had nothing to do. I was being housed by a person who worked for Word Records which was Act’s record label then. All I remember was this person was into Charlie Chaplin and had an album called Judith that I played constantly while he was at work. It’s one of my “desert island” albums like New York Tendaberry. Dan Fogelberg recorded his version.
Rest In Peace Dan

13. SISTERS OF MERCY

This Leonard Cohen song was originally used in the visually beautiful but odd Robert Altman film called “McCabe & Mrs. Miller". I became reacquainted with the song through a documentary about Leonard Cohen called I'm Your Man which had it's screening at the 2006 Sundance Film Festival. Beth Orton did this kind of haunting rendition that for some reason stayed with me.

14. THE WEIGHT

Written by Jamie Robbie Robertson is one of my all time favorite songs. It’s a very simple song in it’s construction but a true masterpiece. The first time I heard the word “cinemagraphic” was in a Rolling Stone Magazine review of the album THE BAND. It's another “desert island album." So many great songs plus one of my keyboard heroes, Garth Hudson.

15. THE BONNIE BANKS O' LOCH LOMMOND

I have always loved the melody since childhood but never knew the story behind the song. There are several but the one I’ve heard that seems to resonate with me is about two captured Scottish soldiers in 1745. Their guards tell them one will be executed and one will be set free to go back to his troops and tell the story... but it’s up to them to choose who it shall be. Who took the “high road,” (the towns between London and Glasgow) and who took the “low road” (death). And I’ll be in Scotland afore ye....

Thank You's

I have so many thank you’s for all their help, support and encouragement (through the years and right up to this moment) that I didn’t have time to thank on this new album.
So I want to take this opportunity. Please know that these aren’t in any special order (except for the first person and the last four!)

Cynthia (my true companion), Mac and Maxine McLean, Joe and Lisa Signor, David Signor, Kristin and Jon Moersch, Laura and Ashlin Cadinha, Desiree Brittain, Jeremy and Michelle Brittain, Ian Peters and Sue Taylor, Joaquin and Eunice Montalvan, Ennio and Tammy DiBerardo, Randy and Lillian Mitchell, Eric and Donna DiBerardo, Nick and Nona Manson, Paul Youngblood, Eric and Lorey Persing, Scott and Sharon Frankfurt, Jerry Kovarsky, Jai Wurfbain, Erin and Emmy Belkin, Troy and Sherri Graser, Jack Leary, Robert and Samatha Bratko, Pastor Scott and Jeanne Fine, Kurt, Sara, Aaron and Lauren Staeuble, Rick and Robin Lloyd, Dan and Maggie Barrett, Bo Powell, Brian and Moira Michaels, Dan and Sue Thomas, John Henry, James Kirkland, John Diliberto, Dave and Jennifer Price, Dr. Elliot and Mac Munjack, Eric and Allison Samuels, Bonita Vanderkooi, Hubert and Toshi Sommers, Kirk Thatcher, Jack and Barbara Brauer, Jack Kelly, Lisa Stutts, Ken Draughon, Paul Offenbacher, Herb Melton, Peter and Michelle York, Buck and Annie Herring, Randy Barton, Tom, Michelle and Barney Amundsen, Joe Chenworth, Kevin Jimenez, Megan Pike, Ruth Calvert, Steven Glossop, Tony McAnany, Eric Zobler, Sister Germaine Fritz, Pastor Joel Osteen, Pastor Jack Hayford, Mike and Jeannie Prager, Robert and Linda Brady, Janine McKenty, Beth and Brad Lawrence, Nyle Steiner, Cathy Morton, Wade Isom, Andy and Maria Thomas, Lane and Jennifer Wesley, Kenneth Mars, Phil and Bernadette Keaggy, Rev. Ed Blonski, Rick and Barbara Hill, Pastor Russ Davis, Terry and Leanne Marshall, Chris and La Vonn Apthorp, Tracy Lemon, Dan and Sue Keyes, Kay and Norman White, Bruce and Nicki Sue Larkin, Robert Ehrig, Kerry Henderson, Abraham and Lynn Laboriel, Darrell and Janet Harris, Twila and Jack Paris, Philip Aaberg, Bill Mays, Mac Rebennack, Alasdair Fraser, Dr. Dean Walcott and the UCLA Medical Team, I am leaving out so many, please forgive me!, Uncle Chet Olsen, Aunt Helen Camin, my mom, Katherine Yorke and my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

NOT listening to that "still, small voice"... Or how A 15th century composer almost ruined my life!

2008-08-01T10:45:00.000-07:00

la-crimis (medieval latin meaning "the tears")
... My wrong, my wrong, my most grievous wrong.~Robert Duncan

Do not seek the treasure!~Pete (O Brother, Where Art Thou?)

These three lines come to mind when the name Carlo Gesualdo is mentioned around me. Stravinsky referred to him as "This great if disequilibrated composer."

Herein lies the dilemma for a musician who wants to use his or her talents “For the Glory of God” and make a living doing the thing he or she loves.

Through a series of interesting events, you sign a one record deal with a well known classical record company, the album gets released and becomes a “worldwide classical/crossover hit.” Perhaps... even a possible gold record?... but I'm not sure.

Oh yes, by the way...you're the arranger and "de-composer" with a another composer who happens to be an 11th Century German Catholic abbess. A composer whose melodies, upon first hearing, transport you instantly into the "heavenly realms."
Next thing you know, the record company wants a “follow-up” album (aka) "V2."
Then... another “interesting event” occurs. A larger competitor company wants to sign you to do the “follow up (aka) Vision II" for them. In fact they want to sign you to a "seven record deal" as part of the incentive. There's just one little catch (aka) “the deal breaker." "We want you to do one of the projects for us using Don Carlo Gesualdo’s Motets.."
I'm going to move the story from you to me now. "Richard we would love it if you did a project like Vision: The Music of Hildegard von Bingen but using Gesualdo's Motets as your source. You just substitute his music for hers, and add your "eclectic arrangements"..."You know, for kids!"
Now the more I researched Prince Don Carlo, the more uncomfortable I was feeling about this “deal.” As I listened to his music, I couldn’t help but project the man himself onto it. This man had some "serious issues" in his personal life!

As beautiful as his motets were, there were moments that were spiritually and emotionally disturbing...to me. Something was not quite right?

DISCLAIMER: Again this is my story and someone else might have a completely different take on Gesualdo and his music.
Although he Dedicated his works to God, I personally heard no “redemption” in his music... just a tormented soul.
BUT... there was this very attractive record offer. The current company I was with only wanted another one record deal. My main contacts at the company had moved over to their competitor and they were dangling the “seven record golden carrot” in front of me. "It was job security for sure!" This seemed like a no brainer going with them, plus I would be in a familiar "comfort zone” too! So, I ignored the Don Carlo "stop sign," took the carrot, recorded the follow-up V2 album. BTW: V2 didn’t do anywhere near as well in the big numbers, although it was a good project and I'm proud of it.
Then I decided to tackle Geusaldo’s Motets and get it done. By that time I actually believed I could give his music the "redemptive quality" it was missing. Talk about justifying your actions!
After what seemed like a year and a half working in " Still Small Voice, God, Jesus," on a Mobius Strip (I’m mixing metaphors again, sorry!)... "our relationship" fell apart between the company and myself and a FAX appears on my Fax machine, as if signed by Gesualdo himself, saying basically, “ YOUR FIRED!”
Now about that Still, Small Voice . I obviously didn’t listen to it! I went "seeking the treasure."
There is a lot more to this little morality play and maybe someday I'll share it. I don’t blame anyone but myself for what happened (not even the record company...anymore!), and I finally forgave myself not too long ago. God forgave me right soon as I asked!
The long and short of me sharing this story is, If the Voice says “don’t do it!”...listen, pray, listen some more and then don’t do it!
PostScript The project did get completed (with the help of a dear friend). It's been sitting in the record company vaults since 1998. RIP Gesualdo (1561 - 1613)

Whatever you do....DON”T GIVE UP ON YOUR DREAMS!

2008-07-10T06:32:00.001-07:00

I hate to be the one to break it to you ;-) but nobody is going to believe in you more than yourself.

This life is not a rehearsal!
It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks more than what you think about yourself.

WHATEVER YOUR DREAM IS, MAKE IT HAPPEN! .... Well, okay then!

BTW: a note to all "literary publishing houses": The writer of this rant is a musician not a Steinbeck or a Hemingway or even a Steinway! :-)

Nobody Tips The Piano Player

2008-06-21T01:57:00.000-07:00

Nobody Tips The Piano Player

words & music by Richard Souther

Verse 1

Got a long distance call from my wife the other day

She said hun’ I think it’s time to leave LA

This town don’t feel the same

The freeways are insane

So I’ve been looking at a land not too far away

Verse 2

I said sweetheart I play the ivories for a living

It’s hard enough to find work where we’re living

But if you say you found Paradise

I’ll heed to your advice

So we packed up all our things and moved to Zion

Verse 3

Somewhere between a sundance and a city

We found a town where folks are real friendly

Got our very own theater chain

Two markets and a train

And I hear the nightlife’s starting to get better

CHORUS 1

But nobody tips the piano player here in Zion

I guesss it’s not their style

Been at this for awhile

Nobody tips the piano player here in Zion

So I guess it’s time to move back to LA

BRIDGE

She said honey hang on things are gonna get better

It takes awhile to start a brand new life

Honey hang on things are gonna get better

No matter what I’ll always be your wife

Verse 4

Got a job at a local restaurant playing my music

And the people seem to like it when I’m there

The tell the owner that I’m great

But when it’s time to pass the plate

It all turns out it's all just a lotta hot air

CHORUS 2

But nobody tips the piano player here in Zion

I guess it’s not their style

Been at this for awhile

Nobody tips the piano player here in Zion

So I guess it’s time we move back to LA

CHORUS 3

Nobody tips the piano player here in Zion

I guesss it’s not their style

They just walk by me and smile

Nobody tips the piano player here in Zion

So I guess it’s time to move back

Guess it’s time we move back

Guess it’s time we move back

To LA....

OUTRO

Goodbye Zion

Goodbye Bryce

Goodbye Wallmart

Goodbye Provo

Goodbye Big Box

Goodbye Parleys

Goodbye

©2008 Northersouth Music/EMI CMG

Nobody Tips The Piano Player... Here In Zion!

I guess blogging can be cathartic for musicians at times. Let me give you a quick back-story on this particular entry.

It's almost 12:30am Saturday morning. It's gonna be my birthday this coming Sunday the 22nd of June. I'll be 57 just in case you thought I was much older! ;-) Got home from playing at the local restaurant tonight. Made fifteen big dollars in tips (probably can see them right in that jar in the photo of me). There were at least forty people in the restaurant. The food isn't burgers and fries. It's high end cuisine and very good.
So what is the dang deal?
The crowd demographic was probably forty-five to sixty something tonight and this is "small town Utah." I hear a lady say,"can you tell that piano player to please turn it down!" Turn it down? I wasn't playing a "Led Zeppelin medley" or a "Sly and The Family Stone Tribute!" It was mellow Cole Porter, Gershwin and Sondheim music. Okay maybe two Billy Joel's as well! ;-) I think "Piano Man" set her off!

Now a few weeks ago we had a private party on a Friday night. Mostly folks from New York City vacationing out here for a few days cause it truly is beautiful living here. What a difference they were! Appreciative, very generous and, wonder of wonders, they were actually listening to my music.

Look...may I clarify something right now before you start thinking,"Man...this guy is just venting cause he got stiffed!" Or... maybe he's not that good of a piano player and tipping was out of the question!, he might have just choose the wrong songs?, too many minor (sad) keys?, his attire was totally inappropriate for such a high class restaurant (judging from that picture!)?, he kinda looks like Andy Kaufman...hey maybe it really is Andy goofin' on us, you know...cause he ain't really deaaa..d...!(brain cloud)
Oh the list could go on!

Yes friends...this could all be a venting session for Souther! It's not though..REALLY!.

Here is where this story gets interesting (in a Paddy Chayefsky "NETWORK" kind of way!)
A few weeks ago, I woke up, wide awake, at 4am and I hear this country western song playing in my head.
We are talking on "Heavy Rotation!"
Now, If you know anything about my eclectic musical history, you'll know that as much appreciate the craft of writing good country songs, the genera is not on the top of my list of "Desert Island favorites."
So at this point in my awakening... I say "Alright Lord," cause this has got to be a "God Thing," and I get out of bed and head upstairs to my reading room and start to write out the lyrics and melody I've been hearing in "my slumber."
Okay...job done, back to bed!
Next morning at 4am, Heavy Rotation" begins again. Am I turning into some kind of Howard Beal? Ready to open a window and yell at the top of my lungs, "Im as mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore!". No...I got up again, went back up to the reading room and finished the lyrics. Then proceeded to record the song over the next few days. I even recruited the help of my dear guitar player pal, Randy Ray Mitchell to add his country magic. I haven't sang in years but, what the heck! Technology now covers a multitude of "Vocal Sins."

Well is this "Lemons Into Lemonade?" God only knows at this point, but it sure was fun in retrospect and I'm even getting some local airplay on the country radio station up here. I'm using the "non de plume" The Patchouli Brothers cause Garth Brooks was already taken! ;-)
Still Tonight...Nobody Tips The Piano Player Here In Zion....

If you really like the song, we'd sure appreciate you buying it...and if you could write us a good review on iTunes too, that would make our day! :-)

All the best and God bless!

Richard

Olivia, You Are So Beautiful...To Me!

2008-05-24T12:28:00.001-07:00

Sometimes it's a hard world for small things. ~H.I. McDonnough

Several years ago we got a call from a friend who said he found a young female cat living on his roof. This friend, like us, is a cat lover. He has three male cats at his house who are his buddies. He asked us to watch her while he went out of town on a trip. He was worried about leaving her alone with the three male cats so he asked if we would take care of her while he was gone.

During that time we fell in love with her as well as most of our own animals. When he returned, knowing that he would be looking for a home for her,we asked if we could adopt her.

Olivia became "our cat". One of the most beautiful affectionate lovable cats we've ever had. It was almost as if she knew we both hit the jackpot so to speak! Our animals our basically like our kids and we treat them as such. Okay we go a little overboard at times, I admit that, but I'm a big fan of St. Francis. Animals were welcomed and blessed along with people at his church. I've always felt it's part of our responsibility as human beings to take care of the "real innocents" on our planet.

Olivia lived with us for almost two years an in July of 2005 she was hit by a speeding car. The good news was she was alive. The bad news was her hind quarters were injured and her tail had to be amputated. We had great vets in Granada Hills California as we do here in Heber City Utah. We spent the next couple of months nursing her back to health. She looks like a bob cat now!

When we moved to Utah almost three years ago, we noticed some discoloration in her right eye.
We really didn't think much of it at the time but as the months went on and the discoloration got worse, our local vet suggested we take her to an animal eye specialist in Salt Lake City. After several trips it was finally confirmed that Olivia may have cancer in that eye and it may spread over into the other one if the eye wasn't removed. It fact there was no guarantee that the cancer hadn't already spread. The prognosis was to have the eye removed. Believe me this was a very hard decision for us to make because her little life hasn't been easy. She suffered a lot from the auto accident and there was no guarantee that the eye removal would prolong her life. But we prayed and felt the chance was worth taking. It's one thing if a little creature is suffering and there is nothing that can be done but the vets seemed optimistic about a full recovery and felt her quality of life would be good.

Olivia is healing up fine. Test results say she is cancer free. And "to us," she is more beautiful than ever!

WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS STORY? Please support the ASPCA. Go to your local pound and adopt, love and take care of a homeless pet. Their love is honest and their companionship is priceless!
Sometimes it's a hard world for small things!

My life didn't turn out the way I expected'

2008-05-13T01:31:00.001-07:00

Iris Gaines: What happened to you, Roy?
Roy Hobbs: My life didn't turn out the way I expected.
~The Natural by Bernard Malamud

I love the movie "The Natural." For years those words of the Roy Hobbs character have resonated in my head.

I was on my own musical/life journey several times the last twenty-seven years. Goals I longed to knock out of the ballpark, only to be shot down by unexpected events. Life, just like the music business, is very mercurial. Disappointments shouldn't come as a big surprise, it's part of life and how we learn and grow. But of course, when they do come, it's never a plesant surprise. Following "The Natural" story metaphor... I would call it "the Harriet Bird pop quiz." Those who have seen the movie will understand what I mean. Harriet has reappeared throughout my life in all sorts of forms, from a tuna fish sandwich to Carlo Gesualdo. I'll explain as I go! ;-)

In the early 80's I was asked to co-produce a brilliant guitarist's album at a very famous recording studio in Colorado. It was a very big deal and a great opportunity for me. One night at the studio and just a few days into the project (thanks to a bad tuna fish sandwich) I got something called Botulism and spent the next few years of my life recovering. That recovery was only thanks to God and some gifted doctors (one especially) at UCLA. I should have been history.
In the process of the recovery my short term memory went away for awhile. The desire to write music was still there. I just couldn't remember the music after a few seconds. Then I discovered this box I could plug an electronic keyboard into called a digital sequencer. Basically a digital multi-track tape recorder (that is a oversimplification for time here). I won't even get into MIDI. The little bits of music I was writing into a now primitive digital sequencer, eventually turned into completed songs and then, through a dear friend, a solo artist music career. I signed my first record deal in 1985. But that's another story!

I released four albums before the little instrumental label folded (shot down!). I then bounced back and signed what I though would be a wonderful "big time" record deal. I was with a company who I felt genuinely seemed to believe in my musical talents. I recorded two good albums with them... but only to end up contractually bound and held for ransom.
Like my Norwegian grandma used to say, "I don't know what happened! They were such nice people!"
Shot down again ...but this time still standing because during that season, although still bound, I was producing other artists without a legal conflict of interest. During that period, I was honored to have the opportunity to produce and arrange a very famous contemporary Gospel singer. Our collaboration proved to be such a success that it looked like it might be the start of a "beautiful long term working relationship." That was at least until the next project I did with her! The "powers that be" at her company were less than pleased with what I had produced on project number two. The "proverbial Harriet" shot me down again! (please humor my somewhat tired metaphor just a little while longer!).

Some time had passed and one day out of the blue I receive a call from an old friend who had just been assigned the position of A&R executive at a famous record company in New York. He was looking for interesting projects to sign and I presented him with several ideas I had been toying with. His company liked one especially and eventually it got made into a record. "Wham" it became a world wide home run hit record. My mom even got to see it before she passed away!

Next thing I know, I've become the subject of a "bidding war" between two famous recording companies wanting the "follow up album." Having only signed a one record deal and my A&R buddy having moved over to the competition, I decided to go with the new company. Although I had a check in my heart as I look back now. They offered me a "seven record deal" and six of them being of my own choosing. A dream come true at last! On the day I signed that deal, I can remember thinking back to the dark year in 1981. I truly believed my musical career (as well as life as I knew it), was over. And I said to myself right then,"thank you Lord... finally my life is turning out the way I had always thought it would!" Just like that final scene in "The Natural" when Roy hits the ball so hard it breaks the lights in the stadium. If life could have only been like that scene. If the credits could have rolled at that point!

My second project I record for my new label was that one in our "contractual seven" not of my choosing. Not even of my liking. I took it though because I just wanted to to get it done, out of the way, so I could focus on my remaining five "dream projects" and put my heart into them.

I really thought the next part of my musical journey was well on it's way finally! But after almost two years of "hell on a mobius strip" (and losing two special friendships in the process), another shot was fired.
I received a fax from my record company saying my services were no longer required. They also made it clear if I were to sign with any other record company, they would have to pay them for "services lost." I'm still trying to figure that one out because they fired me! It would have taken a team of lawyers to go after the "big boys." I couldn't afford that and I knew that no company would ever sign me given that condition. At least not until the seven year "statute of limitations" ran out... "when your audience has forgot you and moved on." Again, Roy Hobbs words returned very loud in my mind.

The last few years I've recorded little "concept projects" by myself, on my own home label and sometimes using the pseudonym "Under The Radar." Up to last year I was hand making my CD's one at a time on a Macintosh computer (including the artwork!) and sending them to CD Baby. My sales are far from what they once were...did I say far! :-)

NOTE TO THE READER: Please know that I'm not feeling sorry for myself for a single minute! And NO I don't completely identify with the film "The Natural" or Roy Hobbs by any stretch of the imagination. Great movie though!

"My life didn't turn out the way I expected".... but it's not over yet! I know I'll get another chance to step up to bat and play in the big leagues... if I so choose and on my own terms! :-) Till then, I'll always continue to do the thing I love, making music. It's part of me whether I'm making the big bucks or little tips playing piano at a local restaurant! ;-) I'm using the talents I believe God has given me to glorify Him.

So if Iris Gaines were to say to me, "What happened to you, Richard?" My reply would be something like, "Life happened, there was no way I could have predicted the future... but God is still in control!

I was there, I traveled but I can't remember when'...Part 1

2008-05-02T22:19:00.000-07:00

About the title : I was there, I traveled but I can't remember when'...

On my new Under The Radar project; at the beginning of TRACK#6, you'll hear a lady saying, "I was in it, I traveled but I can't remember when."

That sound bite came off of a DAT recording a dear friend secretly recorded of my mother, Katherine Yorke relating a story I have always loved to hear her tell since I was a kid. I've probably heard it a million times. She went to be with the Lord in 1995.

Katherine was a "contract player" meaning an actor (both stars and bit players) who has a contractual commitment or agreement to a studio/producer/company). She worked as one from the late 1930s up till the time she had me in 1951 when she retired.

She acted in films with many well known movie stars from the golden age of Hollywood... and had some great stories to go with them! ;-)
Man, do I miss her!

Her IMDB filmography does not even begin to list her hundreds of film credits. Perhaps I can change that someday when my wife and I get finally settled in somewhere and I can sort through her many boxes of movie memorabilia.

Anyway...one day on the set at MGM or Paramount or ???, she was introduced to the star of the film she was about to work on. This was a very famous ACTRESS (whose name escapes me at the moment and that's probably a good thing!). The director said, "Miss ???, I would like to introduce you to Katherine Yorke. Katherine is a seasoned professional who has played on Broadway. I think you two will have a lot in common."
It so happened that this "STAR" was very (I think the kindest term would be) "full of herself" and had a reputation of being rude to almost everyone on every set she ever worked on.
Hollywood, much like the music industry, is a very small community and reputations spread quickly.

Well... I guess this ACTRESS/STAR felt it was her job to put my mother in her place and let her know SHE had nothing in common with some little contract player!

She said, as if looking down her nose to mom, "I played on Broadway but I don't remember you! "Mom gently replied, "What play was that?" The actress rattled off the name of some show. Mom smiled and said, "I acted in that play but the star was (fill in the blank)... wasn't she?
Katherine said the actress face turned white as a ghost and she began to fumble with her words saying something like, "well actually I was the star in the road company version of that play."
Mom then replied, "really?, I was also in that road company version, and you were the star?...hmmmmm!"
The ACTRESS, now busted and having been caught in a web of her own making (but still very full of herself) uttered, "Well, I was in it, I traveled but I can't remember when!'...

I loved that line so much I transliterated the beginning of the phrase to use as the title of this new Under The Radar project.

You can purchase the CD or download the music here at CD BABY.COM

By The Way: What does this story have to do with an AMBIENT, IDM, GLITCHY, ELECTRONICA CD?

STAY TUNED FOR PART II ;-)

"Rubinoff & His Violin"

2008-04-15T21:15:00.000-07:00

This story was related to me by my old pastor who heard it from actor Efrem Zimbalist Jr. as told to him by his father, violinist/composer/conductor Efrem Zimbalist Sr.

The details of this story with the passing of time, may have become somewhat apocryphal but the point of it still remains quite current and universal.

Many many years ago the legendary violinist Jascha Heifetz was rushing up to Carnegie Hall where he was the featured artist performing with the NBC Symphony Orchestra. The Maestro Arturo Toscanini was conducting and the concert was being broadcast live. Arriving at the back stage door, Heifetz making his grand enterance was immediately stopped by a new guard who evidently hadn't a clue who he was. Heifetz became indignant and shouted "Don't you know who I am? I'm Jascha Heifetz, the greatest violinist in the world!" The guard looked at him and replied, "Mister I don't care if your Rubinoff!, you'll have to pay at the front entrance just like everyone else!"...

"Rubinoff & His Violin" were part of vaudeville comedian Eddie Cantor's hugely popular national radio show. David Rubinoff was known and loved by millions of "the common folk!" :-) James 4:6

Why I Am Still A Christian

2008-04-07T12:22:00.000-07:00

No Country For Old Musicians

2008-03-20T19:08:00.000-07:00

"And I don't know. You tell me. This whole dream. Was it wishful thinkin'? Was I just fleein' reality, like I know I'm libele to do? But me and Ed, we can be good too. And it seemed real. It seemed like us. And it seemed like, well... our home. If not Arizona, then a land not too far away. Where all parents are strong and wise and capable, and all children are happy and beloved. I don’t know. MAYBE IT WAS UTAH."
–H.I. McDunnough, Raising Arizona

California was at the peak of the housing bubble when we sold our home a few years ago. It was time to leave the "country" I grew up in. You could buy a new house with new plumbing in a 'Bedford Falls' (from It's a Wonderful Life) type of town in Utah and at what seemed like a ridiculous price. For an "older" musician like myself, this move felt right... or was it wishful thinkin'?

Let me back up for a second. Every so often I get a email from someone who enjoyed one of my "pre-millennium" albums. "Hi there, wondered whatever happened to you! I Googled your name and discovered your website. Glad to see you're still making music!"
Now, I love it when my music gets re-discovered. Problem is I've never stopped making music. I just started releasing the music myself through the internet you can do that anywhere (or so I thought!). I just don't have the "big mean record machine" behind me anymore but... I know where the money is going now!

So we made the pilgrimage to 'Bedford Falls' where housing was comparatively inexpensive (but not cheap!) and the mountain scenery was stunning. Integrating into the small town community was a bit of a challenge having come from another country, but we've made friends.

Through an interesting turn of events, I have come to play piano on the weekends at two local venues. The good thing about that is I am playing out in public again which I haven't done in years. The "not too good thing" is almost nobody tips the musicians (at least in this part of the country). I think that's because, in the small town environment, people think of someone playing music as more of a hobby, not a career. Problem is for me, music has always been my career, not a hobby. Utah may very well prove to be "No Country For Old Musicians." Stay tuned!

"He's coming... cue the sun!"

2008-02-06T16:58:00.000-08:00

Since we've been living here in Utah the last three years, we've been able to attend to the Sundance Film Festival. We're about fifteen minutes from Park City and the same distance from Sundance. For musician friends who might read this, I can honestly say the festival is way cooler than the NAMM show... that is if you are a film lover which my wife and I both are!

This year I was asked to play at a few of the festival events including the Salt Lake City Gala party for a wonderful little film called "The Great Buck Howard". The movie starred Colin Hanks and John Malkovich. Tom Hanks was one of the producers and played a small part in the film (as Colin's dad!). Good casting call!

I took a couple of weeks to prepare some solo piano material for the event. I wanted to be at my best "cause you never know who might be listening!" The event coordinator's words were "keep the music jazzy and peppy!" which I interpreted as stay away from slow ballads and watch the minor keys! I even went so far as learning the themes to "A River Runs Through It" and "Charlie Wilson's War""cause you never know who might be listening!".

Gala night: My wife and I arrive at the venue in SLC to set up and do a sound check. I even wore my old tux (which I haven't worn since I played "You Light Up My Life" on a Pat and Debbie Boone tour twenty-eight years ago!). The event coordinator mentioned that around eight fifteen, Tom, Colin, cast and crew, along with some other VIP's would be arriving for drinks and hors d'oeuvres (aka snacks). So my downbeat is eight and I'm grooving along, playing everything from Keith Jarrett lite to "a medley of my own hit" when sure enough at eight fifteen I hear, "he's coming!" Like magic, this small little venue begins to fill up and overflow with people. The funny thing was from that moment till the time Mr. Hanks and crew left the building, the noise level was so loud you could not hear anything except the "roar of VIP's schmoozing." I could have played The Complete Thesuarus Of Musical Scales and the entire soundtracks to "Forest Gump, Cast Away and Apollo 13" and nobody would have known the difference!
And...I had the time of my life! :-)

Don't you float away...

2007-12-21T09:12:00.001-08:00

Just keep a hold on me
Don’t let go
If you float away
If you float away

Waited too long for a ship to come
Don’t you float away
Don’t you float away....

...from the song "Island" by The Starting Line

I always seem to get nostalgic around this season as I approach the coming of Christmas and the end of another year. For some reason, beyond my understanding, the majority of my family and lifelong friends have "exited" this life during or right after the holidays. I only recently sorted out the mixed emotions I begin to feel the first of December.

When your a kid, you think your invincible and your going to live forever (if you even think about those kind of things!). I tended to always live in the future with great expectation. Now, with some distance between my youth, I've learned the importance of "staying present, being in the moment, and enjoying the people in your circle."

As far as I know, the only things we take out of this short life are the memories of relationships we've shared with family and dear friends. It's probably a good idea if I begin "calling out now"...before I float away ;-)

Lessons With Max

2007-12-10T12:56:00.000-08:00

Professor Giles passed away when I was twelve. When you're a kid you don't quite understand the concept of how one day you're having a great conversation with your best friend and the next day he leaves on a long trip and forgets to say goodbye.

A short time had passed and mom could see that I wanted to continue studying piano. She found another teacher who was local and was quite renown for turning out "great little concert pianists." He was a student of a student of Franz List. A Russian gentleman who was probably in his late seventies. He was from the "old school" of teaching piano to children. If you didn't read it down perfect, you got whacked the fingers! This was, in more ways than one, a "foreign concept" to my previous musical training! I had only seen this type of technique used going to military school (which I barely survived!). Lessons with Max lasted about eight months, till I would get physically sick before a lesson. I decided to quit piano altogether after that experience.

We moved to Northridge, California when I was thirteen. This was about the time of the "surf music" explosion. I lived directly across the street from a kid who was starting a garage band. His name was John Hug and his band was called "The Tears." He knew that I had played piano before. He encouraged me to give it another go by playing organ in his band. Mom got me a red "Farfisa Combo Compact Organ" and in a short time the passion for music was returning. The band was pretty good too and we were starting to "gig" a lot at the main clubs on the Sunset Strip including Pandora's Box, The Whiskey a Go Go, Ciros, Cinnamon Cinder, The Hullabaloo and Gazzari's. As a side note; John went on to become a well known LA session guitarist and producer for bands like the Jeffreson Starship.

Okay! How did you originally get into music?

2007-12-04T21:42:00.000-08:00

North Hollywood, CA: See the picture of the little kid sitting at the yellow toy piano with "Peanuts" trying to figure out the safest way down. Well, that's me at three years of age. My mom took me shopping at a department store and I saw that piano in the toy section. It was love at first sight! I grabbed on to one of it's legs, locked arms, and wouldn't let go. As hard as my mother tried to pull me away, the louder I screamed! As a crowd began to gather, mom realized she had better just buy the thing before the security guard shows up!

Once home, rather than put the piano in my bedroom, mom put it in our den where the television was. She said all I would do everyday is sit at the piano with the TV on , trying to copy the melodies from the TV shows and commercials.

We happened to live next door to a retired dean of music from the University Of Utah. He was now giving piano lessons. He came over to visit one day and heard me playing away and asked mom if he could give me some lessons. I guess he saw something there. That was the start of a wonderful friendship that lasted until Professors death when I was twelve. Not only did he teach me the "three B's of music, he encouraged me to improvise and make it fun. That's probably why I am still playing. I can still hear his voice in my head to this day.

This Train Has Sailed...

2007-11-19T23:40:00.000-08:00

You have to start somewhere, sometime and someplace. Passing on a few of my life's experiences at this time and place should, if nothing else, be entertaining to read. Everyone has at least five good stories to tell, five experiences that changed their lives for better or worse. I'll work up to five and if there are more, I'll continue on. Most will probably be music and God related and some family treasures. Stay tuned!